Epic Rap Battle Of History-God vs Sana
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With 1 vote and 3 points ahead, the winner is ...
- Publication date
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- Two days
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- Open voting
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- One week
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- Four points
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This is a rap battle, where I am GOD and my opponent is SANTA.
- G = God
- Real G = genuine gangster
- OD = overdose
- Anagram of a real G = the villain God blames = Satan [which is an anagram of Santa]
- Ire = deep wrathful anger (not to be confused with the word ‘fire’)
- Beer is alcoholic and Islam forbids the consumption of alcohol, by ‘Islamic’ I am referring to the God of Islam AKA Allah
- Reign and Deer are revolving both as a pun around the term reindeer and also as a symbol of Santa needing his deer less than God needs his angels
- Disney has many Christmas movies but the key part of this, is that Disney is involved in conspiracies of world domination and control and is said to support the Illuminati's agenda.
- A lot of references in Round 1 refer to the fact that Santa Claus is also called Father Christmas, the 'christ' in the christmas and the fact he's also called Saint Niklaus/Nicholas in folklore are things that get brought up.
- The other references should be easier to pick up than these, I believe you'll catch onto them if you're paying attention.
I’ll tell you a secret, G, without the T my name aint sane, in-sana-ty must be rampant in your omniscient brain,
What are you exactly? Did you back Abel or Cain? ‘Cause if you’re omnipotent, why’ve you got a villain to blame?
Anagram of a real G, come and OD on my cane, guess the love triangle between you and your son’s Ghost needs a ride on the Niklaus train,
I mean after all I’m both the ‘father’ and ‘Christ’ in one, like your son Lucifer would be if he had more balls and less chain,
My elves never rebel, they know their place and they strain to please me, even my deer are a species that reminds you I reign,
But with all the ire and flames, you can’t inspire your domain, your own son is the devil, and people mass-murder due to verses in your name.
Yet even their doubt isn’t total, they dare not call you myth,
I’m so subtle people think the presents are all luck, hit and miss,
Who d’you think fucks with their brains to decide whether or not they get each wish on their list?
Who decides who buys whom what, at that time of year?
I do, because Disney paid me billions to buy my deer,
You are all powerful, all knowing, right? Weird,
‘Cause I must at the very least be considered your peer,
I’m depicted as Saint Nicholas, altered your son’s date of birth and jacked your beard,
How’d all that happen if Santa was just an old fat grump with a sneer?
There’s a red and green version of me, but let me make myself clear,
In this debate I’ll paint the wall like your soul’s a fibrous mango and the Contender blends ya’ like some diarrhea,
You’re a real hard worker, 24/7 you’re feared,
I tip my hat to you, and if you’re not the Islamic type, let me give you a beer,
Oh, guess I may as well drink it considering you’re also never here.
I suggest using Winner Selection for this type of debate. As much as User's vote does highlight a major boon of Categorical votes.
Since this is considered a "troll/non-standard" debate, the votes cannot be moderated.
I'd like to vote on this debate, but I feel I must recuse myself on the grounds that 1) I am biased towards believing in God and if God did Rap, He would destroy all comers and 2) I wouldn't know a good Rap if it hit in me in the face.
No thank you, it will make my Round 1 opener make no sense.
Arguments: I really can't decide between these two.
Sources: Con is the only one who used sources.
S&G: RM specifically pointed out spelling and grammar mistakes Pro made.