**Bsh1's DART Race: Round 1**

Topic's posts
Posts in total: 97
--> @Virtuoso, @SupaDudz, @Ramshutu
Are your entries coming? (If I missed them, just point me to the post #)
--> @Ragnar
I’ve withdrawn due to RL time constraints.
--> @Ramshutu
And to think I was going to make you my  demilich

--> @oromagi
ill always be your demilich 
--> @SupaDudz, @Ramshutu, @oromagi, @K_Michael, @Speedrace
I've graded the mini's on a loose 1-10 scale. To be clear, the score modifiers are already accounted for in in the grade, they were to help me grade more fairly (I also moved everything into a word file without names, and waited a couple days before reading).

Entry10
460 words.
Initial reaction: Wall of text.
Story: 7 (didn’t bore me...)
Style 4 (-1 for site instead of sight)
So the horse race. Not a bad time to pull the present tense. I sadly never got invested in the characters, it felt a given that the million to one chance of a pony in a horse race would win. A better ending might have been no miracle (or if there was, mention of doping), or even the loser beating the odds by coming in second or third place, but not caring because it's playing the game that it enjoys.

Entry11
227 words.
Initial reaction: The quote sets a high standard for it to live up to.
Story: 8 (held my attention, made good use of first person, but that ending wasjust so cliché)
Style: 8 (+1 from quote)
The fencing training. Not much to be said. I enjoyed the way the battle was written, felt the fluid motion and determination of the first person narrator... But again, that ending was so cliche. Yeah it's awesome to once get the upper hand, but the shock and awe from everyone... It made it feel like the guy was outright retiring, due to 1 out of a 1000 duels to this person he'd lose, never mind the remaining 999 times.

 
Entry12
142 words.
Initial reaction: Very short.
Story: 5 (nothing progressed)
Style: 5 (wall of text)
Man brushes teeth and strokes his ego.

Entry16
460 words
Initial reaction: Nice formatting.
Story: 9 (outright entertained me, and a +1 from the switch)
Style: 8 (-1 from line break between simply and stood, +1 for use of cretinous, -1 for peace instead of piece of paper)
Boring debate discussions... holy shit they're criminal gladiators about to die! I once got forced to watch Meet The Spartans, and this was already better (that's not meant as an insult, that movie was actually sent to theaters).

Entry17
434words.
Initialreaction: Second best formatting.
Story: 6 (I did not come to care about the characters, and the over emphasis onexplaining details of what the guy did wrong felt incredibly inorganic.)
Style: 6 (-1 from “realizing their grave mistake their grave mistake,” and -1from double quotations inside an ongoing quote (there are single quotationmarks for that, and/or italics)).
Kid manipulates parents, and they instantly change their ways. I feel this wanted to be big and important, but for that to work the audience has to have some reason to care. Maybe were it first person from the kid, and in the end he doesn't get his way?

Entry 26
347words
Initialreaction: Am I seeing references to debaters and maybe the FSM?
Story: 8 (+1 for making me laugh).
Style: 6 (-0.5 from non-capital name of Richter scale (it was named for aperson, it gets the cap.), -1 for repeatedly starting sentences with And.
This was not high art, but it did not want to be. It's like The Predator, it knows what it is, and makes no apologies ('yeehaw! We're going to put on this armor and shoot global warming!').
My story actually had a lot of depth to it and was very ironic/funny if you read it deeper and the perspective it forced you to take (the losers he leaves behind).

I used brevity to my advantage.

But if you're the guest judge so be it.
My story had 152 words or so I thought... Whatever.
--> @RationalMadman, @Virtuoso, @SupaDudz, @Ramshutu, @Speedrace
Unfortunately, since neither Virt nor Supa posted their entries, and since Ram dropped out, I am cancelling this event. Having four participants is not enough to run this kind of thing.
--> @oromagi, @K_Michael
See above.
I won the most challenges lol. Victory is mine.

--> @oromagi, @K_Michael, @Speedrace
In case anyone is curious, here's the base scores I recorded for the air-MAXI.
They were graded a 1-5 scale, which could have been multiplied to match any other scale, but they were intended mainly for me to record first impressions to use when conferring with the main judge Bsh1.

K_Michael:
4.5, deeply enjoyable

Speedrace:
4.5, solid (+1 for relevance)

oromagi:
3.5, I enjoyed the photos (-0.5 for accessibility, next time please put them into an album).

RationalMadman:
3.5, kept pulling me out of any flow with the eye rolling (+1 for relevance)

With grades from the mini applied for tie-breaking, this gives an order of K_Michael, Speedrace, oromagi, and RationalMadman.

Of course this does not account for Bsh1's scoring, which to my understanding was to be done strictly holistically. Were he to have come to the same order conclusion, that likely would have been the outcome, but such is not known.
--> @Ragnar
I've done my entry for round 1
--> @bsh1
Noo i was gonna write poems reee


I was away on holiday

--> @SupaDudz
No biggie, the contest is canceled anyway.
--> @Ragnar
Yea but I really wanted to post poems ;( oh well
This was going to be my weakest Round anyway, was going to win the rap battle against someone who lost a talent show most likely regardless.

Every single Round after this would involve strategy and the rap battle would be demolished by me.

Just because the Judge has a severely different taste in written art than I do doesn't mean I'd lose overall. It's very good that Bsh1 put this first and not last as this is the vaguest win-condition Round of them all.
--> @Ragnar
Ayyyy nice, I’m glad you liked it
--> @SupaDudz
Nothing is stopping you from posting poems.



--> @K_Michael
This would be a better video and song for that purpose:

--> @Ragnar
From being graded kinda since their is no competition