Imabench's Satire Political Trial Debates Signup Thread

Author: Imabench

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Imabench
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I realize that the title of this thread makes perfect sense and doesnt need any clarification, but just for anyone who is equally confused as they are curious, here's the deal: Spring Break in FL got extended a week (im a teacher btw) thanks to the Coronavirus. Knowing Florida for being, well, Florida, that week will likely be extended longer as this virus rages harder through the state in the coming days. Since I am getting bored shitless of getting headhshotted in MW by kids who only use the 725 shotgun, and i'm also getting bored of conquering the world as Nazi Germany in Hearts of Iron 4, I came up with this idea of 'trial' debates for politicians. Heres how they would work

1 - Each debate would focus on one politician in the 2020 race.... Beto O'Rourke, Kamala Harris, Elizabeth Warren, Bloomberg, Sanders, Buttigieg, Biden.... I would be the prosecutor in every case, the other debater would be acting as the defense for the candidate. 

2 - The first round would be a general introduction of the 'charges' against the candidate and the witnesses who will be called to testify. The charges and testimony will be goofy in nature and be limited to just two or three (Example: In Beto O'Rourke's trial, Beto could be charged with Racial Profiling against a sentient AK-47, who has a wife and a family in the state of Texas, as a reference to Beto's policy of mandatory gun buybacks as part of his campaign platform) 

3 - In rounds 2-4 of the debate, a new 'Witness' would be introduced to speak out against the defendant/politician. I would go first in making a case against the politician, then the other person in the debate would get to make up his own testimony using the same witness (Ex: I would ask the Ak-47 what Beto O'Rourke threatened to do to him to make Beto look bad, the other person in the debate could bring up the criminal history of the AK-47 to try to make him look like an unreliable witness and argue that the charges should be dismissed) 

4 - At the end of the debate, there would be a short closing argument like what you see at the end of every Law and Order episode. Voters will decide the guilt or innocence of the candidate and that would be the end of it

I think these debates would be fun, stupid, hilarious, and kind of interesting to read through so im putting this out there to see if anyone would be interested. 

SIGNUPS: 

- You can sign up for any politician you would be interested in being the defense for
- You can sign up for as many trials as you would be interested in. They wont all happen at once
- More than one person can sign up to represent one candidate. If this goes well enough and is funny I might do multiple trials for a candidate


BETO O'ROURKE
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PETE BUTTIGIEG
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MICHAEL BLOOMBERG
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KAMALA HARRIS
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ELIZABETH WARREN
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BERNIE SANDERS
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JOE BIDEN
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DONALD TRUMP
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Vader
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/in Trump
Barney
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I'll try to vote on these. 
Dr.Franklin
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/in Warren
David
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David
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/in to defend trump! 
Lunatic
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Sounds funny, I would participate but I think I would be too inactive with all the mafia games im involved in. I will try to vote though if needed, this sounds entertaining.
Mharman
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Cool idea. I’ve always loved sites like the Babylon Bee and The Onion.
Barney
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With everything going on in the world, this would be a fantastic distraction.