r/amitheasshole-related 4chan greentext poses an interesting question

Author: Mharman

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Mharman
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So I was scrolling through some memes and I came across a screenshot of a 4chan greentext.

So I screenshotted it and c/p’d through my iPhone’s text reading in Images. The greentext went exactly like this:

>Decide to check out reddit to see
if its as bad as everyone says
>Go to the r/AmltheAsshole
subreddit
> First Post I see is of a some bitch getting pregnant at 17 wanting a abortion, boyfriend pleading her to keep the child says he'll raise it

Child is born she starts saying 'I hAvE pTsD fRoM iT' (NOTE: this text was in red, so I assume there is an emphasis on this part of the greentext)

>Father raises child
>ffw 12 years her daughter wants to meet her
>Literally wants no contact
>Straight up rejects her own child
>Everyone cheering her on
>Any people who disagree get downvoted into
oblivion

What the fuck? (NOTE: red text here as well)

Assuming the greentext was accurate in describing the situation in the Reddit post, we can ask this question: Is she the asshole?

Also, what would you say to her if you were to meet her today? And what would you say to the 4channer who posted the greentext?

Discuss.
oromagi
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So we know that she's underage and he's old enough to want to be willing to raise the child- probably done with college, at least.  The age difference would be informative, here. Her choice was abortion and his choice was parenthood and she respected his choice enough to make the sacrifice of going through pregnancy and childbirth for a child she did not want.  In most states, she was legally required to terminate her  parental rights and with that came the legal right to deny further contact.  You can't condemn a mother for not choosing adoption over abortion and then later condemn the mother for not wanting to connect with the unwanted child.  Future mothers will prefer abortion to risking the guilt and emotional complexity of being confronted by an unwanted child decades later.

I think she has made some sacrifices and respected the father's choices and now the father has a state recognized responsibility to respect the birth mother's choice of non-participation.   We would have to know a lot more details before we could start with moral condemnations.  What if the father was her volleyball coach, for example? 12 years later she could very well have friends and family who know nothing about this child and such revelations might bring real harms to a lot of other people.  Ultimately, not enough information but if you really want to discourage abortions in this country, you are going to have to respect a birth-mother's right to no future contact.
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@Mharman
Without going out of one's way of defining what makes one an asshole and what the desired frame of morality is, there is no fixed answer to this question.
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Take responsivity for your actions. I love what the dad did.
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@Intelligence_06
The “is she the asshole” question was just a poetic way of asking if what she did was immoral to you and why.
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Yes but she is less of an asshole than she would have been raising an unwanted child and emotionally neglecting or even abusing it.

I think her rejecting meeting the child makes sense and is actually a bold move that too few biological sperm or egg and womb donors mistake as if they are denying their biological parental duty to not do.

If she meets the daughter, it will either result in disappointment and anger or it will deeply hurt the child that she was rejected by this decent woman, either way it is bound to get toxic and problematic. By not meeting the daughter, she is able to stay an unidentified entity that the daughter can choose to hate or like but not deeply either way.

There is an argument to meet the daughter but it is only worth it if the mother is dedicated to stay part of the daughter's life, which would be at the father's mercy and maybe she has reason to doubt he would allow that long-term.


Mocking her having PTSD from the experience is the real ashsoleove and is some right wing ignorance of mental health at play (they think only war veterans are allowed to say they have PTSD)
Mharman
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UPDATE: I found the Reddit post in question.
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@oromagi
@Intelligence_06
^^^^^ If that helps, of course.
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@Mharman
UPDATE: I found the Reddit post in question.
The link is a good example why women should not make decisions about having or aborting children.
The PSD is typical of women who have to revisit their decision years later.

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It basically says no matter what a woman does she's always wrong and she's always a bitch. She wanted an abortion she caved and had the kid so that Dad could raise it and now he's upset that she wants no contact with the child. She basically said from the beginning I don't want to raise a child and then for 12 years followed through on that. What it is is Dad is getting to the point that he's tired of doing it alone and wants to be able to pass the kid off to Mom for a while and he can't so he's going to call her the problem.
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@Polytheist-Witch
It basically says no matter what a woman does she's always wrong and she's always a bitch. 
Which is pretty much correct.  But hardly unique to women.  No matter what men do, they're always wrong and always dicks. 

The difference is that only women think this is somehow a uniquely female experience.  

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@coal
When's the last time you were forced to carry around a parasite in your body? So shut the fuck up. I was 100% correct in my evaluation daddy lost his second wife daddy wants someone to take the kid off his hands once in awhile and he's pissed off that the birth mother won't do it.
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@Polytheist-Witch
When's the last time you were forced to carry around a parasite in your body? So shut the fuck up. 
Darling, I'm gay.  Bitch mode has exactly zero effect on me, because I'm better at it.

I reiterate what I said: 

It basically says no matter what a woman does she's always wrong and she's always a bitch. 
Which is pretty much correct.  But hardly unique to women.  No matter what men do, they're always wrong and always dicks. 

The difference is that only women think this is somehow a uniquely female experience.  
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@Dr.Franklin
Responsivity.

Was that a metaphor or an analogy Doc?


Top of the morning to ya.
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Up the bum =  no babies. 
Public-Choice
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@oromagi
You can't condemn a mother for not choosing adoption over abortion and then later condemn the mother for not wanting to connect with the unwanted child.
Murdering. Just call it murdering already, jeez. She wanted to murder her child. And I do blame her for that 100%.

If we can simply murder people we don't want, then what is even the point of having laws or a government in the first place?

I applaud the father for saving a life. The mother was the asshole. If HE demanded she got an abortion, he would be lambasted by everyone from all sides. The "right to choose" argument would say the baby should suddenly live, it is entirely one-sided.

This is what is stupid about the whole abortion debate. It boils down to people having hatred for those who aren't even born yet, for a crime they never committed, resolving from a mistake they never made.

If this doesn't show you the current evils of society, I don't know what will.
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@Deb-8-a-bull
Up the bum =  no babies. 
That is usually how it works.  

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@coal
Correct.  

Hey coal ?
Yeah sorry man buttttt.   i am going to need you to make a post the 1899 is starting to get to me. 
Thanks man. 
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@coal
Thanks
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@Public-Choice

This is what is stupid about the whole abortion debate. It boils down to people having hatred for those who aren't even born yet, for a crime they never committed, resolving from a mistake they never made.

If this doesn't show you the current evils of society, I don't know what will.
How is that worse than people who have a hatred for people who are already born that don’t want to being another life into this world.

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@Mharman
Not everyone values their offspring.
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Not everyone values their offspring.
Is that why you were not told about your birth or birthday?

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@coal
Then you have no say in anything female. Dick. 
coal
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@Polytheist-Witch
I reiterate what I said: 

It basically says no matter what a woman does she's always wrong and she's always a bitch. 
Which is pretty much correct.  But hardly unique to women.  No matter what men do, they're always wrong and always dicks. 

The difference is that only women think this is somehow a uniquely female experience.  


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In case you missed it the initial post was about a woman,  I'm sorry that offend your gay ass. You want to talk about how abused men are in society peace feel free to start your own fucking topic. In the meantime considering that you're never going to be pregnant fuck off. You should have less say in any of this shit than a fucking straight man.
Shila
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Polytheist-Witch: In case you missed it the initial post was about a woman,  I'm sorry that offend your gay ass. You want to talk about how abused men are in society peace feel free to start your own fucking topic. In the meantime considering that you're never going to be pregnant fuck off. You should have less say in any of this shit than a fucking straight man.
You have a very foul mouth. Don’t you rinse every time after someone fouls it?
zedvictor4
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I think that the human race is currently going through a rapid phase of devolution.
Shila
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I think that the human race is currently going through a rapid phase of devolution.
You win ratio in debates is below 32%. Should you be making such broad predictions?
Mharman
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@Shila
Hey, look Shila. Just because you aren't a bot doesn't mean you are free to make ad hominem attacks and expect people to take you seriously.

There's a saying made to counter statements like the one you just made: Even a broken clock is right twice a day. Essentially, even the least intelligent person should not be counted as automatically wrong because of their low intelligence. Even people of low intelligence may on occasion see something that much more intelligent people didn't.

That being said, elo ranking isn't a good measurement of intelligence. High intelligence doesn't always show itself though a user's debating skill. It isn't even perfect for measuring debating skills.

For example, the were times on DDO (and I think once  on DART) when users were accused of being "noob snipers." The practice of "noob-sniping" happens when a debater trying to make their way up the leaderboard decides to challenge competition they know for certain are inferior to them (typically new users to the site), for the sole purpose of climbing the elo ladder. This works for noob snipers because it is less risky to take on multiple opponents who are inexperienced and are worth less points than to take on a single opponent who is more well-rounded and worth more points. While there are more points to lose in the event the noob defeats the noob-sniper, it's considered to be rare enough to make the trade-off worth it for a noob sniper.

Conversely, there are some users who may not be the horrible debaters they seem to be because they are constantly challenging more experienced debaters. While they're certainly more rare, they do exist. I know of a couple uses on this site who have low elo here, but used to have high elo on DDO. While it's possible they were noob snipers during their DDO days, it isn't likely. Most of the users I have in mind proved their skills on DDO, and only have low elo here because they challenged another user from the DDO days that was just as good.

Finally, there are some users that just don't put the effort or time into it. While it is true that low effort hinders the development of debating skills, it is also true that some users who aren't developing their skills have better skills than what they have showcased on the site. After all, DART isn't the only place people can debate. They are other debating sites, other social media platform, and there is also real-life debating, casual and structured alike.

To conclude, having a higher elo doesn't mean you are of higher intelligence, and it doesn't even mean you're a better debater. If you are #1 on the site, it simply means you're the best on the site out of those who put actual effort into it (assuming you aren't a complete noob sniper who can't beat better competition). You could be the best debater on the site period, and you could also be the most intelligent user, but that is not guaranteed.
Shila
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@Mharman
To conclude, having a higher elo doesn't mean you are of higher intelligence, and it doesn't even mean you're a better debater. If you are #1 on the site, it simply means you're the best on the site out of those who put actual effort into it (assuming you aren't a complete noob sniper who can't beat better competition). You could be the best debater on the site period, and you could also be the most intelligent user, but that is not guaranteed.
Just checked your  win ration is even lower. It’s under 21%. Why don’t you wait till you got better before offering any advice.