Wylted is officially appointed to lead the Special Counsel investigation

Author: coal ,

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coal
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In re the matter of DDO Election       )
Interference.                                      )

ORDER


The extent of campaign influence lead by, among others, the DDO Elite, has required the appointment of a Special Counsel. 

Wylted is hereby appointed for this purpose.  

Ramshutu
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I think these events require a Speshul counsel
SupaDudz
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--> @Ramshutu
counshul
coal
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--> @Ramshutu
I agree.  Moderation has a conflict of interest.  

I get to fire Comey.
Dr.Franklin
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wow scary
SupaDudz
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--> @coal
Coveny? Not even on this site
RationalMadman
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Wylted shall release his verdict in the following format: 


I will like the others involved to sing the chorus with him.
Castin
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He always gets mad when I ban him and I'm like, "Dude I'm just increasing your street cred. Uh, you're welcome."
Wylted
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I actually would welcome this. I need an assistant, and for members of the community to start sending me relevant documentaction as to the events that unfolded. Any screenshots of PMs between yourselves and mods will be kept classified to prevent reprisals by this administration distraction, but obviously the evidence in them will be taken into account when determining a conclusion. I'll need a couple of ambitious assistants to help me conduct interviews or access information well known in cliques I am not a part of.  
coal
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--> @Wylted
You may appoint whomever you like.  Just remember.  NO COLLUSION!  NO OBSTRUCTION!

lol

coal
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--> @Wylted
Also, the scope of your mandate for investigation has now widened: you must now also investigate (a) the investigation into TheHammer's election interference, for possible corrupt influence by, among others, certain members of site moderation; and (b) the facts and circumstances leading up to TheHammer's ban due to, among others, corrupt influence by site moderation.
Wylted
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I will have a detailed report out after I have all the facts. This I suspect goes deeper than what has been made publicly known, and BSH1 typically ignores my PMs and I won't deny he us the prime focus of this investigation and his cooperation would go a long ways
coal
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--> @Wylted
I expect that he like the disgraced James Comey will continue to conspire with his deep state conspirators to prevent our making DART great again.  Not to worry.  The Wylted Report will tell all. 
Castin
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And he goes back to performing the minute he is unbanned. Behold, the true entertainer.
thett3
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Special Counsel Wylted has an honorable record of service to this community, including as President. I have no doubts that he will conduct this investigation fairly and lawfully. 
Castin
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I will be your assistant. Why don't we team up and divide our labor -- you investigate bish and Virt, and I will investigate the moderator who banned you.
thett3
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You may have to Subpoena him. It’s a good thing that Airmax1227 recently joined the site as he will provide valuable insight on how to Subpoena a moderator. 
Wylted
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Hopefully it doesn't come to needing a subpoena, but so far his entire administration has been stonewalling me. 
thett3
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If they refuse to comply you may need to go to Mike and get an order issued to unban Spacetime and TheHammer in order for them to provide access to the necessary documentation 
coal
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--> @Castin
You are not permitted to participate in Special Counsel Wylted investigation due to potential conflicts of interest, appearance of impropriety, and personal involvement in the subject matter relating to at least two topics for which Sp. Counsel Wylted has been appointed to investigate.  Your motion to join the office of the special counsel is hereby denied. 
coal
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Subpoenas will issue as justice shall require. 
Castin
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This is outrageous. You are making up rules out of thin air. I demand an objective third party investigation into the matter of my admission as assistant investigator. You are obviously trying to influence the results of the investigation to tilt things in your favor. This I suspect goes deeper than what has been made publicly known. This investigation into your investigation will need to be investigated by an unbiased third party such as myself and my appointees.

My goal is to get at the truth, and your cooperation would be useful and would go a long way at proving your innocence.
coal
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Speak when spoken to.
Wylted
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Castin has not been cleared of any involvement in the subject matter. If she wishes to assist the investigation, I would urge her to release all documents she has pertaining to the investigation, such as screenshots of PMs between herself and all suspects including but not limited to bsh1 7th theft, tyrone virtuoso and spacetime as well. as the hammer
RationalMadman
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Wylted, they are playing you. Quit while you're ahead. Coal is being sarcastic, Castin is being even more sarcastic and Thett is always perfectly ambiguous as to whether or not he is being completely sardonic or actually serious as fuck. You are not going to get to investigate anything and that's fine, we are not all in their inner circle. Just accept it and play the game.