Instigator / Con

Rap Battle


The debate is finished. The distribution of the voting points and the winner are presented below.

Winner & statistics
Better arguments
Better sources
Better legibility
Better conduct

After 5 votes and with 4 points ahead, the winner is...

Publication date
Last updated date
Number of rounds
Time for argument
One week
Max argument characters
Voting period
Two weeks
Point system
Multiple criterions
Voting system
Contender / Pro

Unmoderated. If I've already done a Rap Battle with you, you're still welcome to accept.

Round 1
RM and KM, rapping today
The fight is in earnest, but both came to play.
With rhyme and rhythm as weapons in hand
Each makes a meter that's (hopefully) planned.

I construct a fortress and tear his down.
But his walls are of cardboard; mine are more sound.
Not huddled behind a leaderboard score
I'm here at DART for something more.

RM's a madman, self-proclaimed,
the rational bit is not yet defamed
This oxymoronic title is clever, yes
But the insecurity I'd have never guessed.

RM's diet is victory, ambition, and pride
When the outcome's unsure he'll usually hide.
The coward is oh so afraid to lose
But for those with eyes this tightens his noose.
Beat to right-click on the video and Loop:

Funny thing this Bible-carrier's put forth to get my ego deflated,
He thinks it's vital to make a rap battle unmoderated, later changed to 'unrated',
If it's easy wins and sure things that I play with,
Maybe this rap battle's a sure win, but how do you explain these losses of mine*, you fake bitch?
It's true this is a free win, you're easy to play with, 
That's why I baited you into debates and now you're scarred as fuck; jaded.

Michael's the site's admin's name,
You're a wannabe, never gonna be nought but lame,
You can spend all day studying my methods; scorched by flames,
But what you'll find is I'm the kind that's never fought the same,
Your faulty fortress, aint gonna pause this game,
You're the type of noob to cry 'TRYHARD TRASH' when come force my way in,
You're getting boring Michael, repeating strategies again and again,
I'm that guy your therapist told you wasn't real but still lives down memory lane.


Round 2
it's pretty simple, Madman, how I beat you twice.
(My name's Michael irl, it's no wannabe guise)
You were cocky, self-assured of your win
How could the noobie turd* ever get a hit in?
I said you were a coward, I never said you choose right.
I'm , against you, empowered, I'll win again outright.

"Never gonna be nought" is a misplaced double negative
It appears your knowledge of grammar's more imaginative
This rap is unrated because it's not a debate.
Your words are grated,  like nails on a slate.

Please stop acting like you're some sort of saint
I'm almost embarrassed to speak of your taint.
You think you're unpredictable, it's not quite true
I've beaten you before, so you have nothing new.

*turd is a less expletive version of the terminology you rely on, plus it rhymes better. (Hint: s***)

Yeah, so let's get this straight; you win 2 debates against me at a time where I'm busy and you celebrate,
Then further down the line come losses from the boss that's sitting here letting your earlygame strategy fall flat to the late,
I murder the beat you can't purge me, ingrate, I handed you two wins on a platter now charge me with assault, you're a cunt that aint splatterin' with no batteries and yet watch the way you're shivering, quivering vibratin',
You're too afraid to swear, let's check that underwear, I bet you're covered in an anal chocolate cake, K-Michael's got a brain that seems to be breaking,
For 'never gonna be nought but lame' is not a double negative,
Don't step into the ring if you're too soft or noncompetitive,
You're like the old man in your image; couldn't compare to me on steroids as I'm taking a sedative,
You're too new to be a relic, and I feel bad for this; like disrespecting a disabled relative,
But you're bringin' out the claws, Mike, spitting without foresight, you're a janitor of DART and I'm the baddest-ass executive.
Round 3
"Janitor" is right, I'm here moppin' up the trash
You're slipping on yourself, banana peel backlash
The corner office*, yup you're grounded by the parents
Booted upstairs because the truth is apparent.

"Yeah, so let's get this straight; you win 2 debates against me"
Look in the mirror, hypocrite; where should the respect be?
This is my 4th rap, I haven't even lost once. 
You've been doing this forever, so I won't pull a single punch

*calls back to your "executive" line, as well as sitting in the corner, as a child does when grounded.


What? I didn't get a single pun, you're mopping up the trash? Think harder 'bout that, son.
You sweep up trash, or discard it, dunce, You've been in four rap battles and won? against who? Your mom?
The only loss the number one, Ramshutu has, is against this shunned outcast, so don't get so excitedly delighted, punk.
I'm like a tunnel with rubble in; You're stuck and the trouble is even if you make this sexual; I'll admit I aint afraid to fuck with you, runt,
My cumbersome bar-length'd leave you mumbling, hunk, if you dared try to spit out what you swallow; delicious spunk from my trunk,
You're prey me Michael, the K is for Kaka, you skunk; you stink of how pissed off you are like the Natives that Columbus would hunt,
Funny you quote Jack Sparrow on your profile, idolising a drunk, I'm the Barbossa of this black pearl; you dare try run it, it's sunk.*

Round 4
I gotta use the mop cuz my opponent can't hold water.
You have diarrhea from both ends, endless fount of verbal fodder
I'm unimpressed by your *ahem* organs, have you no stomach for politeness?
All this septic backwash is boring, I scarcely believe I'm still here fightin' this.

It's a dirty job but someone's got to get it done
No one else stepped up to plate, so excuse the home run.
That's Captain Jack, you twit, as he's made perfectly clear
The rest is just an insult run aground, so I've nothing to fear

While my thoughts are still on sailing, let's not change tack yet.
Your rap's not Bristol fashion, but here's the maiden voyage (the first time getting wet.)
And now that the storm's come and put a hole in the hull
You can look back and be thankful that I made this battle's points null.

Proof of his profile as I saw it (with the Sparrow quote): k michael profile

Bla-bla-bla you wanna blabber fool? I'm spitting raw shit, taking jabs at your core, you're just splattering saliva anywhere hoping some lands on me as collateral,
I'm a superior being, a spectacular animal, I'm the beast of the Bible, Dracula-esque Cannibal, Satanic catastrophe, 
You think you've don shit for the Title of 'Captain', that's laughable! Actually, I've done had it with your fanatical rappin' fool,
Worshipping yourself like you're infallible, spoilt-brat-ass attitude,  I'm a 10 on the Richter scale, you can't fathom the magnitude,
I'm the snake that fucked your girl, go search for Lilith, cuck Adam, you'll find that the feminists think that apple in your throat's more an attractive banana,
You're get you claps from no happy crowd, you can't pull off the bandana, you think you're Cap'n Jack? Well, that's only true if I'm the Hawk that you've been poopin' yourself runnin' from, Sparrow.
There's actually no swear word in this entire Round o' rap, so you'll have find a new high ground to stand on, your ego's bloated, let's give you scrotum-whack,
My flow's wholesome, vaginal, drainin' you of every drop, got you toasted from molten roasts, so black, no soul left in you Adam, Eve is mine and you're all alone, no idea that the spark in you soul is at.
Round 5
No swearing? Ha! It says s*** right there.
Want to proofread your claims before bringing them to bear?
Even if the expletives were done away with
Don't think that sprawling on about testicles will help, Bith.

Don't call me Sparrow, he was banned for a reason.
Go ahead and call me Wilde* if it's nickname season.
Your bolded words don't make you sound better.
If you were half so bold you would italicize your letters.

My final round is here. I've enjoyed this immensely.
I do wish I could hear you rap a bit more intensely.


*Wilde because one of my other quotes is by Oscar Wilde.

Did I lie? Or is it that I just didn't need to try?
I said shit and said I wasn't swearing, dum diddly dum, roll the die,
You're a birdwatcher, right?* Go and try to fly off a skyscraper, just kidding you delusional fool, you'd die,
One minute asking for the title Captain, next minute saying don't name you after the guy,
Well Michael, Jack, son of a bitch, I don't care if I swear, it's a rap battle and if that offends you too much, go cry,
Wannabe Captain that aint Sparrow, what are you? Blackbeard? Black Bird, I get it aye, aye,
My word's the final one, Michael, K, bye. Adieu little kitten I'm a big bad tiger; next time don't fight me; stay humble, be shy.