why should we take the story of noah as literal?

GRASPING FOR STRAWS #1

YOUR COMICAL FLUSTERING QUOTE RELATIVE TO THE SIZE OF THE ARK: “I said the Ark was a big boat.  Assuming your dimensions are correct.”

You never cease to amaze us in your outright biblical ignorance, and again, calling Jesus’ inspired words as LIES!  What part of the following passage didn’t you understand: “This is how you are to build it: The ark is to be three hundred cubits long, fifty cubits wide and thirty cubits high.” (Genesis 6:15). Now, to save you even more embarrassment, I will let you look up cubics to feet conversion table, which makes the Ark the overall size that I stated, understood, Bible fool?

STRAWS #2

YOUR QUIZZICAL QUOTE ON THE NUMBER OF SPECIES: “How do you come you come up with the number of species?”

First off, Google can be your best information on this question. You see, you put “Google” up in your search engine, then you press “return” and it takes you to the Google home page. Then you type in “how many known species are there,” then you press “return” and then many websites are shown to address this question, do you understand?  Oh, don’t let the term “Science” upset or scare you when searching said websites, okay? LOL

In any event, I was totally wrong in stating 1.2 million species overall, and for that I am truly sorry in leading you astray because the total number should be 8.7 million  species overall at this time. https://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2011/08/110823180459.htm

Addressing your grasping for straws quote to try once again to save what validity you have left within this forum: "We have seen 1000s of new species in the past 100 years." Granted, but you fail to realize that these "thousands of years" you mention can only go back approximately 6000 years from Adam, to Jesus, and to today in the year of 2020 as per the Bible. Remember,  Genesis 2:7 states with specificity that there were 8 pairs of each specie upon the Ark x MILLIONS! Therefore this precludes that from the 8.7 million of known species today, and taking your grasping for straws notion of "1000's of species every 100 years," precludes that there would still be MILLIONS of different species upon the initial voyage of Noah's ark in using the 6000 year time period.   GET IT?  Can you do the simple math on this easy proposition, or do you need further help in front of the membership?!

With the said biblical axioms shown above, address the following biblical and earthly propositions:

1.  How do you propose the 510 foot long Ark housed MILLIONS upon MILLIONS of species that had to be upon Noahs Ark so they would be here today, and barring "variants" of said species which matter not because the starting point was 8.7 million today?

2.  How did Noah obtain MILLIONS of species around the world without  having a large boat to begin with in their search?  

3.  How did Noah, without a boat in the beginning, obtain Polar Bears from the frozen lands North of the Arctic Circle?

4.  You mentioned that there were 3 decks upon the Ark, as if this would make a difference in housing MILLIONS of species, therefore, cite biblical reference to your claim!

Listen, I will stop at this point, because you have enough proverbial egg upon your face as it is! You can't thank me later, okay? Put your "Satanic Apologetic Spin Doctor Hat" on and address the 4 questions above.  

GRASPING FOR STRAWS #3

YOUR CONTINUED OUTSIDE OF THE BIBLE IGNORANCE: “The average size of a dinosaur was about the size of a chicken. Most of the large ones were once small and probably came from eggs.”

YOUR GRASPING FOR STRAWS #4

 YOUR GRASPING FOR STRAWS #5

YOUR COMEDIC QUOTE ONCE AGAIN: “There has never been a worldwide flood since that occasion so we really don't know that there were not safe spots or less dangerous spots for either the salt or fresh water fish.”

HELLO, BIBLE IGNORANT FOOL! Again, you show your complete ignorance of the scriptures because of the following inspired by Jesus passage relative to there not being “safe spots” for salt and fresh water fish, to wit: “And the waters prevailed so mightily on the earth that all the high mountains under the whole heaven were covered.” (Genesis 7:19)

The fact that this verse is using the term “all, and whole earth” precludes that it was a universal flood to the tops of mountains, therefore including the Himalayas that are 23,000 feet in height, get it?  Therefore, there was NO safe haven for any type of fish,  Bible fool!

GRASPING FOR STRAWS #6

YOU GRASPING FOR THE LAST PROVERBIAL STRAW REGARDING HOW NOAH KEPT 900,000 INSECTS ALIVE! : “Perhaps - they were all in larvae stage and stored under their beds. Who knows?”

YOUR GRASPING FOR STRAWS #7

ONE OF THE MOST COMICAL QUOTES YOU’VE EVER MADE!:   “I also expect that if there was no land anywhere - that any self respecting bird is only going to keep flying until they found the boat again.”

Noah was upon the waters for 371 days in a massive ocean, so how many days can a bird fly with its existing energy to “find the boat again”  before it dies and plunges into the ocean? Your finger nails must be bleeding profusely by now for continually grasping for those proverbial straws that aren't even there anymore for you! Priceless! 

YOUR GRASPING FOR STRAWS #8

YOUR LAST RESORT QUOTE IN EVER SO TRYING NOT TO BE THE BIBLE AND EARTHLY FACTUAL FOOL!: “Yes - again which is more believable - a universe that all by itself happened v a God planned and made world. You have your fairy story and I have mine. Mine at least makes some sense - even if not everything. Yours - well it has nothing going for it - except people who wish to deny my story.  They and you have nothing. Nothing at all.”

FIRST THING, you slipped on your Freudian again by you stating:  “You have your fairy story and I have mine.”  NEWSFLASH, here you ADMIT to everyone that the topic of the Noah Ark narrative is a complete a fairy tale! LOL.  OMG, your knees along with your fingernails must be bleeding so much, because again, you slipped upon your Freudian!  You make it too easy for us to show the membership in just how dumbfounded you are relative to the scriptures and actual earthly facts.

Tradesecret, you have provided some of the most comical pseudo-christian Satanic spin that we have ever seen relative to the Noah's ark narrative, and when doing so, many of my friends from very prestigious forums are viewing your laughable posts upon this topic, and sending links to this forum to show them. You will now be famous around the internet Religious Forums in being one of the best laughable Apologetic Spin Doctors for Satan that the internet has ever seen! Good for you, because your moniker on this website will be profusely talked about, but only in a laughable and degrading manner, congratulations!  

 Can you see him in a trial setting in using the same comical skewed logic that he uses for Christianity to supposedly support why he is at trial in the first place! 

BrotherDThomas, wrote: ,  Trandesecret, Seriously, have you ever thought about going into “Christian Stand-up Comedy” relative to your spin doctoring and the rewriting of the Christian Bible and religion?  All you would have to do is act naturally with your assumed knowledge about the Bible and the earthly entities outside of the Bible!  

 Can you see him in a trial setting in using the same comical skewed logic that he uses for Christianity to supposedly support why he is at trial in the first place! 

The Scopes Monkey Trial,  leaps to mind.

BrotherDThomas, wrote: ,  Trandesecret, Seriously, have you ever thought about going into “Christian Stand-up Comedy” relative to your spin doctoring and the rewriting of the Christian Bible and religion?  All you would have to do is act naturally with your assumed knowledge about the Bible and the earthly entities outside of the Bible!  

And just pray that no one questions him on his substance or slaps him with a few facts

BrotherDThomas, wrote: ,  Trandesecret, Seriously, have you ever thought about going into “Christian Stand-up Comedy” relative to your spin doctoring and the rewriting of the Christian Bible and religion?  All you would have to do is act naturally with your assumed knowledge about the Bible and the earthly entities outside of the Bible!  

And just pray that no one questions him on his substance or slaps him with a few facts

Whatever.  I have conducted trials in Asia, Australia and USA -  people keep like paying me. I must be really shoddy. 

you just assert things happen, that are impossible. the only way for the things in the opening post to happen, or to explain it.... is to say there was a miracle, it was all one big miracle. but when miracles happen, there's evidence for it. when someone's retina miraculously heals, there's evidence that the retina was damaged and beyond repair. you seem to think God has to hide evidence, and plants evidence that contradicts what we see. i give God more credit than that. you and i have different presumptions about how miracles work, and how God works. your beliefs are heretical, and sinful. 

Stephen, would you hire an attorney that explicitly stated that ALL dinosaurs were the size of chickens? Tradesecret quote: "Yeah I was wrong about the dinosaur being on average the size of a chicken. It was probably the size of a bison.  My mistake for not checking.”

https://www.debateart.com/forum/topics/1097-why-should-we-take-the-story-of-noah-as-literal?page=4&post_number=95

Poor old Tradesecret digs his hole deeper with a backhoe because most dinosaurs are not even the size of a bison, as T-Rexs are 20 feet in height, and Argentinosaurus dinosaurs were 100 feet in lenght and weighing 220,000 pounds!  Oh my. :(

“In fact some estimates suggest that as few as 7000 kinds of animals were required to be on the ark. No need for fish as the bible indicates it was only land creatures on the boat and it might even have excluded insects.” 

In the mean time, lets say your hypothetical of 7000 "kinds" is valid, even though you are not telling us where this “in the air” quote is coming from, then that presupposes there were 126,000 “kinds” of animals (Genesis 7:2) upon the Ark in only being 510 feet long!

Therefore, in part, Noah’s Ark housed these 6 animal “kinds” out of the 7000 “kinds,” which leaves 6994 “kinds” left that you have to account for, understood Bible fool?  

18 African Elephants weighing in at 14,000 pounds each, and being 13 feet in height (252,000 pounds total)

18 Tyrannosaurus Rex dinosaurs at 20 feet in height and weighing 31,000 pounds each (518,000 pounds total)

18 Argentinosaurus dinosaurs at the lenght of 100 feet average and weighing 220,000 pounds each (3,960,000 pounds total)

18 Brown Bears weighing in at 2000 pounds each and standing 10 feet tall (20,000 pounds total)

18 Giraffes at a height of 20 feet and weighing in at 3000 pounds each (54,000 pounds total)

18 Blue Whales at the lenght of 100 feet and weighing in at 396,000 pounds each (7,128,000 pounds total)

The above numbers of “kinds” shown above does not include the other LARGE dinosaurs of 98 “kinds left,” and the make up of those 6994 other “kinds” of animals that are left! HELLO?  

You said there is no need for fish?! Huh? Then how did fresh water fish reappear when they had to be in the oceans salty waters in their death subsequent to Jesus’ murdering Great Flood?

You said insects were excluded? Then how do we have approximaltey 900,000 species of insects today if Noah didn’t include them within the Ark, because the salty waters of the oceans would have killed all of them?

“Yeah answered above. As for polar bears - answered that one. At the time of the flood the bible indicates that there was only one continent. Prior to continental drift. So the polar bear if it is a separate kind which incidentally I don't think it would have been would have just walked onto the boat.” 

How could Yahweh/Jesus’ chosen Jews know there was only one continent upon the earths FLAT SURFACE? Did they have "drones" to see that this was allegedly true?  Since you state that the continents drifted apart, are you laughably using Genesis 10:25 to make this claim where it was 100 years subsequent to Jesus’ brutal murdering Great Flood? Remember Bible fool, you only have 6000 years from the origin of man to this day of 2020, UNDERSTOOD? Begin to explain this proposition, BEGIN:

: “ So the polar bear if it is a separate kind which incidentally I don't think it would have been would have just walked onto the boat.” 

DEBATEART membership, need I say anything more about Tradesecrets Comedy expertise when he stated: “The polar bear would have just walked onto the boat! LOL! Mind you, Tradesecret is an alleged attorney, and to use this type of presentation in a trial, he would be barred. Priceless comedy at Tradesecrets expense!

“And all flesh died that moved on [c]the earth: birds and cattle and beasts and every creeping thing that creeps on the earth, and every man.  All in whose nostrils was the breath [d]of the spirit of life, all that was on the dry land, died.  So He destroyed all living things which were on the face of the ground: both man and cattle, creeping thing and bird of the air. They were destroyed from the earth. ” (Genesis 7:21-23)

 “Actually the bible indicates that there were not seven of each animal. 2 of unclean animals and 7 of the clean ones. Two of each animal entered the ark along with seven of each clean animal. The clean animals entered for purpose of sacrifice and for food for Noah and his family.”

As usual, your lacking in simple math skills is embarrassingly at the forefront once again, along with your deceiving mish-mash attorney talk. “Actually,” Jesus’ inspired words state with specificity that 7 PAIRS of clean animals, which is 14 animals and not 7 animals as you erroniouosly state, plus 1 PAIR of unclean animal, which for the mentally challenged in math like you, equals 8 PAIRS equaling 16 ANIMALS of each "kind" that were to board the ark. Understood this time LIAR?

 "Take with you seven pairs of every kind of clean animal, a male and its mate, and one pair of every kind of unclean animal, a male and its mate," (Genesis 7:2) 

“Yeah, I already said I don't know how any of this worked and everything I am saying is speculation.”

Tell the membership, how can one have TRUE faith on your pure speculation which is not vouchsafed within the scriptures but only by your “hearsay?” Listen up, you can use your same speculation on whether the serial murderer Jesus God existed or not, because outside of the Bible, the existence of Jesus ONLY exists in a truly embarrassing form, of which the first mention of Jesus outside of the Bible is 70 years subsequent to his alleged death upon the cross through the HEARSAY of Josephsus' Antiquities writings, H-E-L-L-O! 

“I notice you omitted the part I took from the bible. Hypocrite. It just proves you know you are wrong.” 

I excluded the Bible part to save your sorry ass from anymore embarrassment, Bible fool!  READ!  AGAIN,  Noah was upon the waters for 371 days in a massive ocean, so how many days can a bird fly with its existing energy to “find the boat again”  before it dies and plunges into the ocean? ANSWER THIS QUESTION!

 “Well actually I never called mine story a fairy story. I called yours one.”

HERE IS WHAT YOU SAID RELATING TO NOAH’S FLOOD, TO WIT: “You have your fairy story and I have mine.” blatantly indicating and including that you think the Noahs Ark narrative is a “Fair Story” AS WELL, PERIOD!  Do I have to give you another English language lesson again in syntactical sentence structuring? Huh?  No weaseling attorney talk can save you from what you actually said, in that you stated Noah’s Ark is a fairy tale! LOL. Nice try, NOT!

 “ Well thanks Brother for making me famous. Whenever you show my words - I am sure it will plant seeds into thinking brains.  God works in mysterious ways. 

Your forgot to add the word "logical" to "thinking brains."  Listen, I am getting emails where a lot of members would like you to come to these prestigious worldwide known forums to be basically bludgenoned to a non-existence in regards to your total biblical ignorance, Christian faith, and comedy act.  Are you game? Huh? If so, I will message you. Don't wimp out, okay? Trust me, it will be quite an experience for you! LOL

 "And the other thing you conveniently leave out is that I have said on numerous occasions that there is no significant reason why a infant T Rex could not have been included on the ark. It was not necessary to take adults.  At least give your responses some dignity."

To address your blatant biblical circular reasoning in wanting Noah to load only “infants” of the "kinds" of 7000 animals that you promoted, and to support your wanting proposition to fit all of the 126,000 “kinds” of animals per Genesis 7:2 upon the Ark, I’ll give you some science facts,.

 animal infants without their FULL GROWN MOTHERS are lacking child-rearing regimens from 1 year and beyond, of the mothers sustenance, the teaching of hunting skills, and where all mothers teach their young to be independent, productive adults who can support themselves in their given environment.  Therefore, without the "infants" ADULT MOTHERS rearing regimens, and being upon the waters for 371 days, these animal infants would be dead before they saw dry land!!!  

,then what you are saying is that the following images within the links below of ADULT ANIMALS X 2 loading upon Noah’s Ark are WRONG over the years? WTF!

https://assets.answersingenesis.org/img/cms/content/contentnode/image/am/v14/n4/noahs-ark.jpg

https://cdn-stream.httpid.com/c202/wp-content/uploads/2013/12/lol.jpg

https://cdn-stream.httpid.com/c202/wp-content/uploads/2013/12/lol.jpg

Seriously, have you ever thought about going into “Christian Stand-up Comedy” relative to your spin doctoring and the rewriting of the Christian Bible and religion?  All you would have to do is act naturally with your assumed knowledge about the Bible and the earthly entities outside of the Bible!  You would have sell out crowds, where people would be lining up for your Christian Comedy Shows as shown alone in your posts relative to Noah's ark!  You are truly missing your calling!

Listen, I could take time away from my Greyhound Bus Depot Ministries, my Nevada State Brothel Ministries, and my ever so popular, Nudest Camp Ministries to be your  road manager.  We would make millions of dollars on your Satanic Devil Speak apologetics and Satanic spin doctoring!  

Give it a serious thought, okay? Thanks.

YOUR DEFINING GOD QUOTE WHICH IS LAUGHABLE: “For God to do supernatural things would be to suggest that God is some type of superman. He is not. He is divine. Divine beings doing things which divine beings do - they are not miraculous per se.”

please address why Jesus hasn’t produced another flood to murder the inhabitants of planet earth AGAIN!

“The Lord saw how great the wickedness of the human race had become on the earth, and that every inclination of the thoughts of the human heart was only evil all the time. The Lord regretted that he had made human beings on the earth, and his heart was deeply troubled.” (Genesis 6:5-6)

Barring the biblical axiom that our Yahweh/Jesus/Spirit is omniscient, therefore knowing that His JEWISH creation were going to be terribly evil in the future, was just another insidious set-up to murder them.  Why hasn’t Jesus flooded the world again today?   Per capita, the evil in this world is thousands of times greater than it was in biblical times when it was nothing for Jesus to pull the trigger to flood humanity! 

And do you seriously want him to send another flood? 

And people are still led to believe that it's all true....And people still believe that it's all true.....

That's conditioning for you.

LOL @ you. None of these floods have destroyed the world in the way that Noah's flood did. Not even close.