1. Isn't DDO irrelevant to DART?
No, it isn't. DDO is the direct predecessor of DART, and many people on DART have been debating on DDO for years before they came to DART. As the original debate site, it has had a pretty significant impact on a substantial number of debaters. There are many connections between DDO and this site, some of which continue to this day.
2. If the instigator is that unsure of his position, perhaps he/she is not equipped to debate at all, regardless of sequence. And why would the Contender not have the same concern in leading an argument due to a waived round? Perhaps they're not well-equipped, either.
Sometimes, yes, instigators are unwilling/unable to fulfill their BOP first. But in some cases, it is simply impractical to fulfill BOP as instigator without contender going first. I'll have to search for some examples, but there can be (and most likely are) debates where this is the case.
Debate is a risk. Let's call it that, and stop this nonsense.
I agree, there is a certain element of risk when it comes to debate (I should know, I've had to forfeit debates in the past due to unexpected events crowding up my schedule). However, that is what some people do, whether or not the reasons for it are legitimate. Here I'm simply saying it as it is, not as it ought to be.