why don't people consider being a christian who thinks the bible is not the exact word of God?

I feel that today should hold some pretty important significance to christians and other theists alike.  

April fools day. 

Or is that for pollys group again. ?

Jesus did april fools didn't he. 

What does the bible teach us about April Fools day?

 HCB on AFD 

My old folk were also devout atheists.

Though they always had fish every Friday.

Sort of a subliminal nod to the past I suppose.

Dad would have herring or sprats, whatever was cheapest.

Sister and me would always have fish fingers.

And I can't remember what mum had.

Probably a piece of stale bread dipped in my Dads fish fat. (Times was hard)

Sister was always ill on Friday evenings.

Took them years to work out that she was allergic to white fish.

Though to be fair, allergies hadn't really caught on back in the day.

Life must have been hell for all those gluten and lactose intolerant people.

We can eat a bunch of the animals god made,,,

no prob ,,

BUT DO NOT under any circumstances  EAT THE FRIGGEN APPLES. 

Pity that Adam and Eve were Vegans.

Or they would have eaten the bloody snake instead.

And I wouldn't have been compelled, to spend my whole life sinning.

Aren't Vegans just perfect.

Indeed Deb,  the crime of all crimes, the "sin" of all sins..  Children scrumping in their neighbours orchard.

Make a .

I believe in god post . Then go. 

Then go like . 

Haaaaaa. 

April fools fucker.  

I do not in fact believe in the god thing. 

Burn .  Not for entirety, just

Burn.

Then they would all be like bammmmmmmm you got us.  

And I'd  be.   Yep. 

I may even, from a hight ,  actully drop the microphone. 

You know what i mean . 

Drop the mic. 

Today being APRIL FOOLS , id like the theists to know .

Well To know that they are somewhat entertaining .

Im beginning to think that god put you guys hear for ummm. 

My amusing .... thats not the word . 

To laugh at .  Under breath.  

Im under the impression that no one has yet said someting wrong here in religion forum. 

Like.

I can speak absolute bat shit crazy nonsense anddddddd. You'll have to add to the little game of thoughtie thoughts. 

We play. 

Mmmmmm  paganism.

Shit did i just type that out loud? 

Thats been ( terrets turets terrets is that the word . 

Every so often i feel it necessary to say loudly . 

Mmmm paganism.  

APRIL FOOLS DAY SHOULD OF ALLINGNED  WITH THE VERY DAY JESUS RESERECTED.

I MEAN . 

WAS RESERECTED. 

THE DAY HE WALKED THROUGH STONE.

HIS COMEING BACK TO LIFE DAY. 

NO.

HIS COME BACK . 

FROM AFTER HIS DEATH.  

 You know like, like  when he died then came back. 

From the diying .

He wouldn't be dead from dying anymore . 

His fully alive again.    After his death

Then bring it home with 

Ha April fools , theists aint entertaining. 

 

I repeat.

Theists Ain't entertaining.   

Soooo

The crime of all crimes .

The sin of all sins 

Isnt something one would class as an " immoral " in any way shape or form. Act.

One might even argue its good for the populace. 

Thats.  Getting  kids to eat a apple.

To sum it up. 

The crime of all crimes and the sin of all sins is also, or can be considered  ,  ( a moral act. ) 

Eating apple's is not a  " Wicked  " act. 

However.  

Eating shit that god said not to. 

thats a  instant start alllll over again.  

God made a figgen apple evil.  

a apple  is not evil , wicked in any way ,

buttttt god made it wicked. 

It reminds me of a story about a poison apple. 

And a lady in a black dress with a hook noes with a wart on it. Tried tricking someone. 

A WICKED WITCH.  

Im starting to think Apples are fucking evil.  

Deb-8-a-bull,

YOUR BIBLE IGNORANT QUOTE RELATING TO THE GARDEN OF EDEN: "BUT DO NOT under any circumstances  EAT THE FRIGGEN APPLES." 

Uh, catch up on your Bible studies by learning that NO APPLES were ever mentioned relating to the Tree of Knowledge in the Garden of Eden!

Alarm triggers.  Oh fuck no please dont be me.

Please dont be me 

Brother . Hi there .

Real sorry about this. 

The fucking cats been lying on my keyboard again.  

Sorry about that big fella. 

I agree with what you said .

' slowly takes one big step back ' 

Genisus 2: 16 and a third. 

Yep ... 

Right you are.

' takes another larger step back ' 

So embarrassed 

Cat will not be doing that again.,

  

'  quickly shuffles away ' 

P.s .   Happy April fools day. 

Fucker

Stephen,

Hmmmm, notice that subsequent to my post #108 in showing that Miss Tradesecret has so many Bible missteps in the links given, that she is now silent for good reason because she seemingly doesn't want to add another post whereas I will have to show her Bible Stupidity again!  Good move on her part!

Notice when Miss Tradesecret is silent, for good reason, then the equal Bible fool to her, DavidAZ, makes an appearance within threads in making a Bible fool of himself as well, hmmmmmm ..............

Seriously, what would we do without the outright Bible Stupids®️ of Miss Tradesecret, DavidAZ, and YouFound_Lxam, where they are shown as an example in how not to be a True Christian!

.

God was going through  his " testing stage " ,

like setting up family fight to the death bouts     

And 

The ever popular,   Kiddy dashing . 

God changed but  hey? 

He seemed to change with these laws we humans  made up. 

Like 

He stop getting guys to go door to door killing others pretty much exactly the same time we the humans made it " against the " law " if you will, 

to NOT go door to door killing whom ya thought needed killing. 

It is crazy how god had to curve and calm down his behavior  to what appears like ,  to fit in with the "  law  " things  that the humans made up.

What i am tring to say is . 

Its obvious 

His our bitch now.

Remember.  

We the humans  tell God what  to tell us. .

 

Always have always will.  

 

Alllll the popular gods appear to be going  soft. 

Allah for example,  puts little effot into wreaking  havoc these days . 

( i shouldn't say that actually ) 

Each day gods get less and less staunch.  

 It appears  they are greatly restricted by them law things we made up .

Right? 

Thats crazy .

And weak as piss.

I'm thinking about painting God Yellow. 

(( WHY yellow YOU ASK ? ))

Well Thats none of your business is it 

 His my god and I'll paint him any color i like. 

God today is the exact same one that was doing that  vile shit alllll that time ago. 

Why dont he do stuff like that anymore?

Jail.

Its almost like. 

Gods scared of you guys going to jail.   

SOFT AS