Please make a post to this thread if you want to be part of the revolution.

I am not sure how to fix myself. If there is a god I cry in appreciation of the mercy shown to let me have gotten away with being such a prick for so long. I got protected a LOT by god and do believe in one. Again, I know I write this, feel this and in a couple days need to fight myself reverting. I am just saying I see it now. I didn't see it before. Not really. Not ever. In my eyes I was always reacting, responding, yet I was instigating and provoking too.

I want to formally apologize for selfish reasons to get it off my chest also so that this is the last post that defines me which is a privilege Id not even have if David had had his way and banned me and maybe was right to want that.

To make this at least seem less of my attention seeking bullcrap Ill be specific in my eloquent way (the eloquence is real, egotistical or not).

Airmax, if somehow you see this via others, I am sorry and grateful too for you seeing me as the troubled guy I was and having mercy always.

Bench, Sir Lancelot, Ramshutu, Wylted, Lunatic, all of you. I allowed my pain and agitation to cloud me. Sorry means nothing here. I understand if you all think I'm a shithead. I really see it now, it hurts and I am writing this before my ego blinds me and before I detox from all social media.

Mikal, sorry for assuming the worst. I do not grasp charity of the sort you got, blame my autism blame anything. There are many members perhaps including me that needed such money to help us gain independence or pay bills/fees. We needed it as bad and I do not get why you get to be the favorite saved one yet look at me.

Just look at me. The toxicity I got away with.

I helped build DART up from scratch but I tarnished it all the way through as well. I think it is a lie to say sorry for how I acted alone. I am sorry for acting at all. Even to myself. I tried to soothe pain of being a pathetic loser IRL stuck in a super toxic situation that covid lockdown exacerbated and was never truly mentally well.

One day you will realise how abusive you are and it will sicken you.

Addiction, Flaws and the Madman's last goodbye.

You are a sissy pushover that can't make your mind up about people.

You always were effeminate, but this is going from 100 to 1000.

This whole post is the epitome of you bootlicking David, so you can regain the opportunity to backstab whiteflame. 

Bootlicking David is what you did to gain admin status in his discord server. Backstabbing means Id have had to fake charm him and promise loyalty to him and then backstab. If that was my plan, Id have acted far more careful.

I cannot backstab someone I openly oppose.

Do you feel it is commendable to have your cycles of having the back of someone publicly that yoy the  break down tear and and degrade the moment they seem weak?

You are even trying it on Fishchaser, it is a really strange habit. You actually remind me of him in some ways.

This is not complicated.