(Joke debate) Chuck Norris is the most powerful man in the universe
The debate is finished. The distribution of the voting points and the winner are presented below.
After 3 votes and with the same amount of points on both sides...
- Publication date
- Last updated date
- Type
- Standard
- Number of rounds
- 2
- Time for argument
- One day
- Max argument characters
- 10,000
- Voting period
- One week
- Point system
- Winner selection
- Voting system
- Open
rules:
chucknorrisfacts.net is a valid source for this debate.
saying any fictional character is stronger than Chuck Norris is okay.
joking is okay.
DO NOT MAKE THIS DEBATE POLITICAL.
Whoever makes the funniest arguments wins
I will refute these points 1 by 1.1. Everyone can do that, if they know how to ride a unicycle. [1]This is the definition of "wheelie". Since there is only one wheel on an unicycle, the only wheel is both the front and back wheel, which makes that if you are riding a unicycle, you are always doing a wheelie.
3. It is very common for onions to cry, since that is what makes you cry in the first place. Cutting onions releases a liquid that contains a chemical which stimulates the glands in your eyes to cry[2]. Crying is literally just outputting liquid, which is what onions do here. If you are wearing a spacesuit or those sealed suits wore by the cleaners of the nuclear wastegrounds, then chances are that you can do that too.
4. https://youtu.be/SrU9YDoXE88[3] Seeing that we have built such complex systems of counting even on an infinite level, this is normal, for any mathematician.
5. THIS IS THE ONLY SOURCED POINT. It basically says that Chuck Norris cut a rock in half with scissors. That is not impossible, as scissors are wedges, and look what wedges can do[4]. Anyone with such a skill can do it, with enough time and enough scissors. This skill is not impossible to learn.
6,7. [citation needed]
8. I don't know about the reasoning, but it is perfectly possible to use this keyboard with a mouse or even a touchpad since you can just select and Ctrl + X. Not impessed.
9. That still implies that Chuck Norris uses Windows, which is not that impressive.
10. The logic presented seems like that Chuck Norris roundhouse kicking air immediately creates hurricanes regardlessly, as if it is bound to happen for every kick. That is untrue as I clearly have a recording of him kicking yet NOT creating hurricanes[5].
11-12. You would need to disprove Lamarck, Darwin and Mendel to say this, or to prove that Chuck Norris gives way to natural selection. Evidence is needed to prove that Norris is God, Jesus or Noah, in which none of those proofs are presented. If Norris is a God, then he is not a man[6], which violates the topic.
13. That would mean Chuck Norris is a meteor[6]. A meteor is less mobile than a person once it hits the ground due to a lack of sentience[8] and the sheer mass and size. Plus, that would Norris not a "man" at all, which violates the topic itself.
14. That just means Chuck Norris is unable to write books because books write themselves(which the point writes in a way not related to Chuck Norris controlling it, the letters just form words by themselves).
15. First, that would make Norris a Deity, or the Big Bang, and definitely not a man. Second, suppose if he drove his mother to home at birth, that implies cars and mothers exist prior to Norris. Points 2 and 15 contradict each other.
16. That just means he has essentially rewritten how mathematics works. You can do that anytime, just maybe people don't accept it. Pro did not put any evidence that this act was affimed by mathematicians.
17. Not impressed. It is already possible[7].
18. Considering stones are not alive from the start[8], you don't even need to use a bird to kill them. You don't need to stab a corpse in order to make it dead.
19. One can as well simply just destroy the foundation of periodic table by recognizing water, fire, wind and earth as elements, but nowhere in this point was stated that anyone agreed on it. Again, I can do it too, but people are free to think whatever bullcrap they call "Hydrogen" exists.
20. Actually, you can do that, everyone can. The Iphone, which is a cableless phone, still can utilize charging cables and wired earphones. In fact, you can just strangle anyone with a long string taped upon a cableless phone. A cableless phone is just a phone that does not require cables to make it work, but it does not mean it can't have decorative cables. Then again, I suppose this is not as cool as Darth Vader, who strangles people without the use of any phones at all.[9]
This guy was the Chancellor of the entire galaxy for the Galatic Republic, which controlled an entire galaxy. After that, for a few years, he declared himself Emperor and kept ruling the galaxy for another 25 years (19BBY-4ABY). Before the Empire was formed, he had an intricate plan for power in which he recruited 2(two) powerful Jedi as his apprentice, used the former(Dooku) to help him play both sides in the Clone Wars, in which he ran the Republic while secretly aiding other powerful beings, including Dooku, who leads the Confederacy Separatist movement and opposed the republic. Later, he recruited Anakin(Vader) and made him a governmental official and used him to enforce the galaxy for the entirety of the empire's duration.Not only that, he is a Sith Lord. Although there can only be 2 Sith Lords at a given time, the fact he had 3 apprentices and planned what to do with each one of them and when to dispose of them shows that he in fact is a powerful being. Not only that, he killed Darth Plagueis, his master, which could save literally anything from death(while saving himself from death).Palpatine then ruled the First Order(or Dark Empire or even the Crimson Empire) even after his first death in 4ABY. They later turned out to rule half of the galaxy. Palpatine created Sith Cults and even made clone bodies of him in far ends of the galaxies, and has abilities to shift consciousness before bodies, which he did in his "death" at 4ABY.
Palpatine is an incredible master at the Dark Side of the Force and the combat of red lightsabers. Palpatine is one of few individuals to possess the ability to use lightning, which he killed people with it with unlimited power. He is also skilled in telekinesis, predicting the future, and creating a dark aura that corrupts individuals with dark force.Please state how Chuck Norris could beat him. In any case, Chuck Norris will just be shocked by Palpatine after he uses Norris as a pawn then electrocutes him after he no longer has uses.I rest my case here.
I'm not going to say who won, but the loser had to wear his underwear on the outside for the rest of his life.
If he did, it would be only 8 minutes long. 7 of those minutes are for the intros and credits.
Chuck Norris has to carry a concealed weapons permit when he wears his regular clothes.
- That sounds absurd, so absurd in fact that I am almost certain that it is fabricated. Chuck Norris breaks the confinements of physics, creates a Big Bang, and yet he only kills millions of people and only kills hundreds with the wheel. [1]This is the definition of "Big Bang". The term is only applicable to universal-scale explosions. The world has more than a billion people. If anything, billions will be killed at least rather than "millions" and "hundreds". Which means this point is fabricated and invalid. (Mic drop)
- [no contention]
- Yeah, because that is what onions do. They output liquid that makes you cry. Crying is outputting liquid and onions always cry before you do because it is the liquid as the cause that makes you cry as an effect.
- Counting from 1 to 2, you are skipping infinitely many real numbers, such as 1.1, 1.2, 1.31415926, etc. Therefore, counting from 1, 2, 3, 4... then to ω should also be allowed, which allows yourself to count from 1 to infinity in seconds, since ω is an infinitely large ordinal number.
- The question then becomes, "what is a normal pair of scissors"? I maintain that a normal pair of scissors is anything that looks like a regular pair of scissors. As the great physicist Archimedes said, "Give me one firm spot on which to stand, and I shall move the earth." With a regular lever large enough, he can lift the Earth. With a pair of scissors scaled up enough, anyone can cut the Earth.
- Finally this is sourced, but since it is from reddit and you know reddit is the home of many chuckling pedophiles, we ought to not trust Reddit ever again.
- Same as 6.
- All of us humans can make mistakes, yet he cannot. If so, that would mean Chuck Norris is less powerful than us on this part. I wlil prpsoufeluly mkae msiatkes hree to sohw tihs ponit.
- That still doesn't mean using windows is impressive either. #LINUXGANG #GETOWNED (insert MLG horn sounds)
- Oh my god, this is like an "expert" saying that vaccines cause autism and I ask him to show evidence WITH evidence against him, and all he says is the process supposedly that autism are induced(which is of no proof). Why should I trust you, especially since I have brought evidence that he in fact kicked without causing hurricanes.
- Absolute no words have been dedicated to prove whether Norris is God, Jesus or anyone remotely close to their level. We are not arguing whether Norris could be the most powerful man, we are arguing whether he IS. If there is no proof that Norris is a Jesus-level being, well, no solid evidence if so, then this argument is dismissed.
- Same as 11.
- Same as 10.
- You would think that Norris would have written more books if so, but this is a list of all books authored by Norris[2]. You would think that such a "powerful being" if so would produce hundreds of books a day but no. Clearly either he doesn't use this ability or he is very unskilled at it.
- Same as 11.
- According to everyone I know, the construct of "man" or "human" is completely within the bounds of physics and logic. If Norris is beyond that, then he is not a human, which is self-refuting.
- All of us know that a Windows computer does not explode like that. #OHHHROASTED (insert MLG horn sounds again)
- Same as 16.
- You don't have to recognize the periodic table or even the element of surprise to begin with because of the freedom of thought and speech. I believe that Earth, Fire, Air and Water are 4 elements, and whoever is calling bullcrap such as "Helium" or "Oganesson" or even "Surprise" are deluded. I am free to believe so. Not impressed.
- "Hey boss." "What's up?" "This guy needs to be choked, I am calling from my wireless phone." "Alright, I will strangle him myself." *dead* "I am Darth Vader. Don't mess with me, rebel scum."
- If Norris is unable to die, that means we are superior since we have the ability to die in which he has not. And we are not omnipotent either, so Norris could not be either.
- Superman's suit is 1 piece. It is just how it is colored[3]. Absolutely NO superhero would ever wear a piece of clothing that will fall off easily during flight. On the other hand, Norris often wears shorts, which are similar to underwears both topographically and functionally. So, who won? You tell me.
- The most similar character in the SW Canon universe with Chuck Norris is arguably Darth Maul. You know how he went[4], heavily injured by a Padawan(who is not yet master) mere minutes after he was revealed to 2(two) Jedi. That is pretty weak to my standards. Also, Darth Maul was used by Palpatine as a tool who didn't want to keep him going till the end anyways, employing 2 other fallen Jedi afterwards otherwise.
- Since Palpatine can simply use the Force, and that Norris carries weapons in his clothes, chances are that Palpatine will 100% win this fight because he knows telekinesis, electric shock, and the Dark Side of the Force. Norris will just be zapped to death before he could do anything. And if he does anything that could beat Palpatine, he simply fails to keep being human, which still defeats Pro's argument.
Very tempted to give pro the win for con taking this so serious he defended Superman's whole underwear thing...
Ultimately, the gish golloped nature of the long list of Chuck Norris facts, made them more a pain than a boon after the first few (this got way worse in rebuttals which excluded what they were responding to). And then the defenses, I didn't find funny (the unicycle one for example just went on too long trying to sound like a Chuck Norris joke, while losing the elegance of those jokes).
In contrast, con immediately started demanding citations, only to pull a fictional character, and refused to make jokes about said fictional character (even the simple he unified the galaxy, and saved us from the Jedi could have carried it)...
Overall, I'm calling this one a dud.
I wasn't going to vote, but RM is missing the point of the debate.
PRO mentioned in his description:
Whoever makes the funniest arguments wins
So thus, no matter the logic involved, whichever one was funnier is the winner.
Since PRO had the funnier arguments, they win.
Pro never once gave a coherent definition of power or how to measure it.
Con retorted point by point of why that doesn't necessarily matter for Chuck Norris.
I am not sure to count the Palpatine point for Con or not, this debate was quite... odd.
I believe this is a misclick. Sorry about that.
Intelligence blocked me for voting for him here.
To my understanding:
If it goes unvoted, it does not affect ELO.
If voted a tie, there is a small ELO shift toward the middle between the two debaters.
Why does my ELO drop in the case of this tie? Is there a glitch in the matrix?
You better not pull that shit on my kissing debate.
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>Reported Vote: ComputerNerd // Mod action: Not Removed (non-moderated debate)
>Voting Policy: info.debateart.com/terms-of-service/voting-policy
>Points Awarded: 1 to pro.
>Reason for Decision: See Votes Tab.
>Reason for Mod Action:
While the vote made brief mention of another vote, that was the least of the reasoning (as much as said reasoning would need to be expanded on a serious debate).
This debate clearly falls into one or more category of non-moderated debates, and the vote does not seem to be cast in malice. Therefore, no intervention is merited.
https://info.debateart.com/terms-of-service/voting-policy#non-moderated-debates
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Comedy Debates
Debates primarily designed to be humorous or facetious, or containing primarily humorous or facetious content, are not eligible for normal moderation. That said, while not a requirement, voters on these are encouraged to judge arguments based on how funny they found each case.
Please do not join an obvious comedy debate with the intent of treating it in a wholly serious manner. Similarly, if it’s a serious topic, please don’t toxically try to turn it into a pure comedy debate (which is not to say excluding all jokes from normal debates).
https://info.debateart.com/terms-of-service/voting-policy#comedy-debates
Unless you provide reason why I am unfunny, this is a vote reportable.
I am publicly asking you to consider a voter countering a vote by another voter.
Is this approach allowed?
If not I then report computernerd's RFD.
If yes, I really do not care
Do NOT say I'm being dumb, just following the rules PRO set.
Chuck Norris already existed in the universe before the universe began. If this doesn't make sense don't worry, Chuck Norris doesn't even give a **** about logic, Chuck does things that are logically impossible all the time.
Your debate has been mentioned in the DART Bard. Read it here: https://www.debateart.com/forum/topics/7647-dart-bard-5th-edition-ddo-dies-6-12-2022?page=1&post_number=1
Now vote for the funniest
It's very funny from a personal standpoint. I would score the debate a draw by virtue of its entertainment. I also don't know how you manage to respond so quickly.
So, what do you folks viewing this debate think of it?
(Joke message) Do you really think emperor Palpatine can even get close to facing a guy who scares the s**t out death and roundhouse kicked nothing to cause the big bang?
What is even less(or more) impressive is that I have been using the same Dell since I started in DDO. Now it has burn marks on it and it uses windows.
"That still implies that Chuck Norris uses Windows, which is not that impressive."
That was a pretty good burn.
Minor Correction:
This is [6]https://biblehub.com/kjv/numbers/23-19.htm
The source regarding meteors is [7]https://www.sciencenewsforstudents.org/article/dinosaurs-extinction-asteroid-eruptions-doom
No thanks. I don't want to spoil my perfect 3-0 record!
Wanna be con anyways?
Good joke
No one could win this debate as Con.
Except Chuck Norris.