Rap Battle: Big L vs Eminem

1709

rating

565

debates

68.23%

won

Description

Pro assumes the role of Big L and Con assumes the role of Eminem.

This is Big L during the year that he passed versus current Eminem. (Nothing about either of these two is off-limits.)

Rules:
1. Both sides are expected to try and mimic the rapping style of their rapper they are acting as. Plagiarizing their lyrics or choosing a style of lines they may use is allowed. However, this rule is an expectation. Not a requirement. Either side can rap differently if they prefer.
2. Voters decide who they think won, but they must quote their favorite lines from both sides and explain why one side did better than the other.
3. Pro is emulating Big L and dissing Eminem. Con is emulating Eminem and is dissing Big L.
4. This is not a diss between the users that are Pro and Con, this is a lyrical feud between the characters they're portraying.

Definitions:
Battle Rap- Type of rapping performed between two or more performers that incorporates boasts, insults and wordplay.

Round 1

03.12.2023 05:32PM

Pro

(https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=vE8zqwAK-GU) Music for the first track.

You’re a walking dead man, Slim.

All coked out, talking smack

Like a drooling inbred skinhead

Spouting rhymes with jokes as weak as your hairline.

I’m the real Top G in this game.

You’re not a high enough level for this boss fight.

What a tragedy.

Like you can get more raggedy.

Sad, cuz Marshall thinks he mattahs.

Binge-eating so he gets fattah.

You’re dead weight, Shady.

Sink like the Titanic.

Get used as bait because there’s always bigger fish.

All bluff, and full of fluff.

Actin’ like you’re so tough.

Cryin’ life is unfair because you’re built like an albino teddy bear.

You’re confetti, thinking you’re in the same league as Nick Cannon. Looks like you need some tannin’

Mariah played you, shamed you, humiliated you.

Said yo’ wee-wee is the size of an Eminem.

Got no one else to blame but yoself.

You big fat, broke bum.

With tats making you look like a sucker.

Stuck thinking bout how you still wanna fuck her.

03.12.2023 06:40PM

Con

Beat:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=moTchMxT9I0

Yo, Imma pull my D out to the DART board and jizz bang-in-the-middle,

I made the Queen into a harlot after you were busy eating her out with 'em big Lick dribbles,

I'll stuff the pun inside a hoe and make you listen to this riddle,

She's a cow, I'm a pig, you wannabe GOAT stuck in the middle,

Oink as I boink, what's the point in this, big L?

Any girl I fuck's a fine ass swine, yours are ewwwww and lack the horn, no trickle,

I tried to search if you had a wife or any children but I guess we aint gotta worry about a lamb or chicken little,

You don't even have family as an excuse for quitting the game, you're fickle,

I bounce back, boing! oink oink, you fucking sheep to the game with the shook bones, brittle,

Why you scared L? You call that spit? Sun's out and there aint even a rainbow from that gay ass drizzle,

I'm a cracker, why you scared? You've been lickin' cracks and spitting out what you get from the hush-hush ghostwritten dogshit, L.

Round 2

03.12.2023 07:26PM

Pro

2nd Beat: (https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=SnXsENld7Rk)

Sorry Em, Couldn’t hear you

Must’ve been the sound of your teeth getting in the way of you giving head.

Should’ve left my D out your mouth.

Quit while you’re still ahead before you catch oral cancer.

I’m the real Em-Cee, you’re just an NPC.

I fuck real chicks while you pay for toothless hicks that give you genital ticks.

Yeah, you got great taste with the real picks.

You’re a useful punching bag.

Quite the washed-up fag.

Try not to shed a tear, queer.

I’ll bleach your hair blonde by using your head to scrub my toilets.

Oh, and you look like a buff lesbian.

Should I call you Ellen Degenerate?

Could’ve had an actual career instead of serving beer if you spent as much time working on them lines as you do snorting crack.

But now, you’re just gonna get smacked.

This is your last chance because next time, I’m not holding back.

03.12.2023 10:48PM

Con

Beat: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h7NBEcRgBos

How the hell is this guy acting like the main character while testing me?

Died in '99 but knows of the acronym NPC?

Getting chilly with the ghost vibes off this friendly G,

Gotta flirt with me and out o' force of habit see my ass and grab it, big L straight through to the G B T,

B for Britain where fags gets smoked RIP L, but don't get me wrong; I'm not your enemy...

I'm a pitcher, you're a catcher, but who's holdin' the bat?

I'll give credit where it's due, they don't put 9 bullets in a rodent, cat,

You's more puss than rat, more bitch than bat,

Back with the beef-fuelled metaphors good doggy, are you sat?

I get it you're trying to gamble, saying I'm bluffing but my hat has a cracker rabbit that is rabid and spits rapid you blink, brains splat...

Round 3

03.12.2023 11:47PM

Pro

3rd beat: (https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=0hy6dH61dFA)

Nice blowjob, Em.

Deepthroating Lil L like a corn on a cob.

Kiss your career bye after you suck me dry.

Playing lip-diddle with my big fiddle.

Like damn, you really sucking off more than you can chew, old man.

Taking little shots like Pew-Pew to my Boom-Boom.

I ain’t no ghost, fool. But you bouta be when I’m through with you.

By the way, yo momma says I’m a little baddy,

Guess you gonna have to call me Big Daddy.

You think we’re battlin’, but really I’m a fucking tsunami and right now, you’re jus’ paddlin’

Oh yeah and nice beard, Em.

Makes you look like Cthulhu.

Take my advice and get rid of it, then we’re gucci, cuz that thing looks like it’s got more pubic lice in it than Kim’s coochie.

03.14.2023 12:41PM

Con

Beat: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HsGUZCBxveo

Oooh La La, full homo for the promo, I see, you're more than a bit loco but I told you, I bounce right back like a yo-yo,

You always wanna go slow, no homo bro but flow-wise I rip a hole in your powerpuff girl shit, I'm Mojojojo,

You assumed I'd be a no-show, boo hoo Buttercup, go floss your teeth or I'll Blossom the only plaque you lived to show, oh no what a low-blow. So, hoe?

I'm gon' burst your Bubbles like the Popo at yo' do' to inform yo' Mom that at twenty fo' you had to go, bro,

How you know about the lice in Kim's cunt that's a no-go, I'd say I'd kill ya but 9 bullets and you still can't rest, here's dessert, little boy, hot bard heat a mug with coco,

You sippy sip but want sugar, 'cause it's so-so, daddy always told yo' sugar, spice 'n' everything nice makes up for the fake that every pic of you can show's got the crybaby vibe of a mugshot photo.

I'm here to teach you a lesson you aint gonna forget soon, son,

I kept hip hop alive when you were way past done,

You inspired horrorcore, glorifyin' drugs 'n' guns,

Wonder if it's a phantom at work that got you killed by one, you malfunctioned droid for the industry, dunce,

I'm the one to avoid, you done fucked up big-time here with these stunts,

Went from calling me fag to backtracking like a slag that's got a positive result on a test she wish she'd flunked,

I don't get if you're tryna appeal to the rainbow punks, but trust me, more gays have wanted to try me more than once, on all fours than your entire fan-base you make lesbians wanna try that femboy face, so eat those cunts.

Round 4

03.14.2023 03:25PM

Pro

4th track: (https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=Zn7uBic6N8w)

Listen here, you buck-toothed fuck.

You got less testosterone than Bieber.

Lookin’ like a beaver.

Betta change your dentures, chipmunk.

What’s wrong, my schlong got your tongue?

Take this as a tip, punk, before I murder yo ass.

You’re a pariah after getting dumped by Mariah. Bet Nick’s warming her up all quick and easy.

Meanwhile, you’re stiff and queasy.

Go blow your nose, Slim. You starting to sound all nasally like a Muppet.

Shoulda figured since you’re getting played like a Puppet.

No humility, no personality.

You’re all quack, but no tact. Looking at me with your Thousand Yard Stare.

Pucker up, son.

You’re just a dollarstore version of Mark Cuckerberg.

We’re trading blows because all the real men keep stealin’ your hoes.

Yes, I called you homo for this promo, bitch.

The fuck you gonna do bout it. You’re more of a pussy than Chris Cuomo.

You wanna be me so bad that you transformed into the biggest clown in town.

You not a rapper,

You’s a wholeass capper

Constantly firing blanks, while I be shootin’ missiles. Yes, yo momma quite the slag. No wonder you’ve turned into such the hag.

I died, ‘cuz that’s what happens to real legends, homie.

You not even gangsta.

You’re just a tech geek, freak.

Calling me your role model.

Better tread carefully, cuz you’re whiter than Vanilla Ice.

I’m inspirational, you’re forgettable.

Sad I’m no longer around to give you my autograph.

03.16.2023 12:20PM

Con

Beat: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JPkepLhvEac

Walked into the last Round a real believer, sayin' I got less T in me than Bieber,

Big Lesbian still aint got the memo, femboy face but why's nobody sittin near her?

They aint even sittin' on the mouth that's been silent for no less time than an era, is it an error if I ever dare say it as e-ra? Oh dear,

You've been noone since the nineties, you're a relic not a peer, I don't think anyone's buyin' what you're sellin', 4 disses in and you're still clinging on the lifeline of who's queerer,

I get it, you're all hung up on the fact I left the seat up 'fore you sat sulkin' like a schoolgirl plagued with diarrhea,

You had guts to come up here but my punchlines got your stomach runnin', that's a bloody acid burn that you're feelin' on the rear,

I'm the reason you should fear ever settin' foot near battle rap ever, am I crystal clear?

Let me put in terms you comprehend, my bars are like bullets from a pistol, y'hear?

It's abysmal the way I lay you to waste and the waste's clogged up, why's the diarrhea not flowin' well with the cistern? Here, let me put a plunger on your mouth, that's better for us all, shut the fuck up and keep it in your system, malfunction get a seizure,
Why're you measurin' manhood when you don't even register on the meter?

You're a noone, take the big L, lick my anus, you aint famous, people had to Google who the fuck you was 'fore reading this, see ya.

04.15.2023 01:34PM

#39

“Enjoy your big L”

That comment didn’t age well.

04.15.2023 03:07AM

#38

Should I bother on voting since RationalMadMan has left?

Athias

03.21.2023 06:10PM

#37

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@Sir.Lancelot

I think that your rap battle ideas are fun. If you ever do a rap battle where Notorious BIG is involved, and I can assume his persona, please let me know. I'll happily accept.

03.21.2023 05:58PM

#36

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@Athias

Thank you!

Athias

03.21.2023 05:53PM

#35

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@RationalMadman

@Sir.Lancelot

Hopefully the both of you will find my reasons satisfactory.

03.20.2023 09:45PM

#34

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@Bella3sp

If you have google docs, you can pull it up in another tab and take notes for each round.

03.20.2023 09:43PM

#33

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@RationalMadman

@Sir.Lancelot

@DavidAZ

RationalMadMan & Sir.Lancelot,
Alright, cool. I finished reading this rap battle, or diss. I have my ideas. I think i'll be voting. I practically have my vote made in my head, it just needs to be typed and formatted correctly.

My vote should be published at least by the end of the week.

DavidAZ,
I see.. thanks.

DavidAZ

03.20.2023 09:15PM

#32

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@Bella3sp

I figured how it flowed with rhymes.

03.20.2023 09:07PM

#31

My rhyme and flow was also true to Big L’s style.

03.20.2023 08:52PM

#30

@RationalMadMan

The grading quality of this rap battle is based on who the voters feel won.

It’s up to them how they decide to judge.
Some measure quality based on internal flow and rhyme, and some leave that out entirely.

Some choose to grade based only on the quality of the disses which is how a lot of rap veterans decided to grade.

If they feel I rhymed and flowed better than you. Then they are allowed to vote for me and vice-versa.

03.20.2023 08:47PM

#29

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@DavidAZ

How did you choose the points for legibility? It was never explained and i'm curious or would this be counted with the flow?
If I vote, my vote would include many different factors but I am asking in curiosity which may or may not affect my vote. It most likely won't due to my opinion being quite different from others.

03.20.2023 08:46PM

#28

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@Sir.Lancelot

This was not close. Wtf. 30% of your raps did not properly rhyme or flow like at all..

03.20.2023 08:39PM

#27

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@WeaverofFate

How did you decide how many points to give the winner in your vote?

03.20.2023 08:26PM

#26

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@DavidAZ

Thanks for the vote!

03.20.2023 02:11AM

#25

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@RationalMadman

I plan on it.

03.19.2023 08:51PM

#24

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@Bella3sp

Also, you should give all 7 points to the one you think won unless you think it was very close like Weaver did, at least that's my take. This should have been 'winner selection'.

03.19.2023 08:24PM

#23

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@RationalMadman

@Sir.Lancelot

RationalMadMan,
You do have a point.

Alrighty, i'll see what I can do. I have another debate to vote on with the_viper and Sir.Lancelot but i'll get to it when I can.

Sir.Lancelot,
Your good. It was a bad interpretation on my side. I can see your reason for specifically liking someones voting style, almost everyone does.

03.19.2023 08:20PM

#22

Everyone is welcome to place a vote.

03.19.2023 08:19PM

#21

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@Bella3sp

No, I worded that badly. My apologies.

I didn’t mean I didn’t want you to vote. I meant I chose Weaver because I like the video commentary.

Please vote if you want.

03.19.2023 08:17PM

#20

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@Bella3sp

That is unfair on me? I would like you to vote please.

03.19.2023 08:16PM

#19

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@Sir.Lancelot

I wasn't sure if I was gonna vote either way. However, would you like me to not vote? I can do that if wanted.

03.19.2023 08:14PM

#18

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@Bella3sp

I chose Weaver specifically to judge on this because I’m a fan of his voting style.

His and AleutianTexan’s. (RIP. He stopped coming online.)

03.19.2023 08:10PM

#17

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@WeaverofFate

Your vote tempts me to vote..

03.19.2023 01:33PM

#16

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@WeaverofFate

It is ashame you didnt rate flow and rhyme scheme, nor comeback disses or carryover metaphors.

03.19.2023 01:30PM

#15

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@WeaverofFate

in the end, he had an extra savage point because you corrected it wrong and you took me referring ti the burn of diarrhea as a gay line but I don't think all Eminem bars land correctly on a first listen/reading so that is true go Eminem's style. It did also refer to butthurt.

03.19.2023 03:12AM

#14

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@WeaverofFate

(2:30-2:36) Round 1
“All coked out, talkin smack
Like a drooling inbred skinhead”

(2:37-2:41) Round 1
“Spouting rhymes with jokes as weak as your hairline.”

I remember you reading these lines, but I didn’t get points for them.

Which category do they fall under in the video?

03.18.2023 03:56PM

#13

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@WeaverofFate

Thanks man. 😂

Those voices were killing me

03.16.2023 02:56PM

#12

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@DavidAZ

alright, that works

DavidAZ

03.15.2023 03:07PM

#11

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@Sir.Lancelot

I don't have the credentials for voting yet, but I'll leave my vote in the comments.

03.15.2023 03:54AM

#10

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@DavidAZ

You may vote too if you want afterwards.

03.15.2023 12:08AM

“being true to the represented artist's rap style and 'flow' of the internal rhyming.”

That’s an unrealistic expectation. WeaverofFate said he doesn’t listen to rap, so that would require him to listen to more songs before he got an idea.

03.14.2023 11:58PM

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@WeaverofFate

please factor in turning one's insults against them, being true to the represented artist's rap style and 'flow' of the internal rhyming.

WeaverofFate

03.14.2023 10:57PM

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@Sir.Lancelot

We'll replace argument strength with the severity of burns and lyrical style.

03.14.2023 09:50PM

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@WeaverofFate

Is your methods for voting on Rap Battles the same as a regular debate?

03.14.2023 12:43PM

fact not fake* round 3

03.12.2023 07:36PM

I'll be subscribed to this debate.

03.12.2023 04:17PM

Never heard that one before.

03.12.2023 03:55PM

Enjoy your big L