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Does one allocate a certain amount of time for so called " searching for God "
I will now attempt searching for god for the next ( 2.5 minutes )
That doesn't work does it ?
Actual searching for god is a lot like saying you are searching for god I'd say.
I would like to be talked through a ( five minute search for god )
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I suspect A LOT of people have played their ( ☆☆☆☆☆☆ BORN AGAIN CHRISTIAN ☆☆☆☆☆☆ ) Card much much to early.
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I cant help but feel, if i was a Christian, and truly believed in the GOD.
I would be gunning for the top spot. ( move up in the ranks )
Like i would want to be the pope or a bishop or cardinal at the least.
I wouldn't be no half arsed theist.
God must like the pope more then a priest
He must lke a priest better then a basic once a week church attendee .
So on.
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@Reece101
You beat me.
Very Well played..
Again happy thou
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@Reece101
Not being rude but.
I don't like you having 999 posts.
Can you fix it for me please mate? ASAP.
We are all good hey ?
Happy 1000 posts Reece old pal.
Good day.
Thx man.
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To a more important question.
And somthing that is on all of our minds .
Major Woo Woo.
( WHO IS . MAJOR WOO WOO ? )
My guess is .
Major Woo Woo is a great teachers of this ( reki ball ) thing.
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@Discipulus_Didicit
Note takin.
I will try.
I spell at about a grade 5 level and dilexci as.
And every word i have to clap the syllables
This along with my below average spell checker correcter er.has me making something i want to quickly say into the above.
I will start with downloading this expensive spell cheacker i have and linking it up.
I hear ya.
I mean , thats the last thing i want.
That being. A random guy in this here religion forum to think i am not realy a ginucs
Guinea
Guiness.
See like this word.
My spell checker want put up guineas.
Is that the word?
How the fuck am i supposed to just know how to spell guineas
That is not even how you spelk it is it.
Where was i ?
Thats right.
PLEASE DON'T THINK I AM A DUBM DUMB GUYS.
One doesn't reach ( LEVEL 6 in Rakky and tuna
I mean.
Reki
Hang on. ' Scrolls up. '
One does not reach the hights of a ( REIKI ATTUNEMENT ) EIR. OR ER )
LEVEL 6.
Also.
I'm not the one who is currently niot sitting in a unbroken sat ring.
But Thanks De diddy disipt for the advice.
It probably could be funny some of the stuff i say if was presented correctly hey?
Good day.
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@Stephen
Yeah 77$ is a bit steep.
And its probably like not even real.
I think my 77 bucks would be much more productive in furthering / advancing my levels in the chineese practice of Feng shui.
Actually
Who'd win in a fight do you reckon.
A Feng shui master. ( 5 years in practice )
Or a
5th year. Reiki attuner.
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Reading more into it.
And the long and the short.
I have to put my dog in the bath with the toaster.
This better work.
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Oh . And it is only $77 bucks.
That seems fair .
Did you get it cheaper then that ?
How much did it cost you ?
I am going to love this answer.
Poly.
How much did it cost you ALLLL UP . ( for a basic level one. ) ?
Do you get a certificate with that.
Man that would be sweet.
That seems fair .
Did you get it cheaper then that ?
How much did it cost you ?
I am going to love this answer.
Poly.
How much did it cost you ALLLL UP . ( for a basic level one. ) ?
Do you get a certificate with that.
Man that would be sweet.
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Now i am trying to picture a reki attunment being preformed.
I have a picture of A " Full body reiki attunement " ? With a " happy ending "
And like a basic standed.
Point to point reki attunment.
Hang on .
It is Japanese,
I just fully properly read about reki just then.
I see what it is now.
And i just completed my first online reike course.
Im now fully qualified rake master.
I can also make a beautiful swan from a single sheet of A4.
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Andddddddď .
If you ard thinking about using you ( reiki powers on me , please note. ( I WAS NOT BORN YESTERDAY )
I was in, and now still currently in a ( FULL CIRCLE OF SALT )
Im not like stupid.
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I read the post alllllĺlllllllllllllllllllllllll the way to the words ( my level 1 )
Thankyou.
Thankyou.
To have it a guess I'd say ( six )
Ya got six dream catchers in your bedroom.
With two currently operational.
You sound like a girl poly.
Crap did i just say that out loud
I mean , it's a girl thing to do.
But thats not wrong is it?
I guess what i am trying to say is .
Us ( sixth level ) and above a Tunas .
I mean tuners.
At toners
I mean a tones r
Us level sixers shouldn't waist our time talking about the ever so basic ( Level one exam ) forrrrrr.
What is it again?
' i scrolls up '
REIKI
'scrolls back up again '
Atunment
Anolement
Enlightenment
I mean attunement.
Yeah REIKI ATTUNEMENT
I wouldn't bother talking about REIKI ATTUNEMENT with anyone under like a basic levle 4 .
You level oners can't even mix potions yet.
No but I do remember after passing my ( level one ) raket ball.
I mean
Reiki
Yeah reki
, i remember how swore my hips and jaw was for weeks after.
. But thats self explanatory. Keep this in mind.
Oh and Goodluck on passing ya level 3 . Youve no chance.
Good day.
( MY GUESS AS TO WHAT IS ( REKI ATTUNEMENT )
Ok is it like a indian thing
Something to do with Chakras .?
Crystals maybe ?
Like. Certain points of ones body.
Now i will utilize google.
Oh.
I see.
They are a alright Band i suppose.
Fair enough.
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CURRENT NUMBERS .
1.9 Billion Christians
To have it a guess , Id say,
One billion of these would consider themselves a "current " ( ☆☆☆☆ TOP 10 ☆☆☆☆ ) of allllllll time at
( SCRIPTURE TRANSLATING ) / DECIPHERING ING )
TOP 10 might be a bit harsh hey?.
Well definitely TOP 100
Imagine ( NOT ) being good at translating scriptures.
Imagine some bloke saying to ya , ' i reckon i am a below average scripture trans later '
EVERY THEIST ON THIS SITE IS IN THE ( TOP 100 )
CONGRATS.
YOU HAVE THAT SPECIAL QUERKY WAY.
Good game.
Good game.
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Eve does look pretty hot in leaves.
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It makes me wonder what it is that you might make your God tell you next. Its like living on the edge. BAMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM and ya off on a tangent.
Let us now take 6 seconds.
6 seconds to think about that BLOKE that said ' HEY '
He said
' We should get the god thing to speak in a funny , half arsed manner kind of deal.
Not quite here and not quite there.
Brilliant idea.
And a 5
And a four.
Three.
Two.
And a one.
But It's not about dodging the bible when you are young . It is alllllllllll about not seeing that, ( NEO GEO ) .
You know the one? That issue with toppless african women.
Mmmmmmmm Very nice.
Also.
Audible Bibles.
Do Bibles on my computer work like them hard backed paper ones ?
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I am going to put to my girlfriend that i am thinking about taking a second girlfriend.
She will swear at me.
I may even be assulted.
What i am trying to say is.
I dont think i have ever known a girl that when this was put to them , they would be all like. (' oh ok .that sounds good dear.' )
I imagine that, When it comes to this polygamy thing ( ' it's all about your first wife choice. ' )
Its so important.
I wouldn't marry 4 ugly chicks.
Actually polygamy doesn't work with fat chicks does it ?
Maybe i can take one ugly wife and three hot ones.
Look i am going to pass on this polygamy.
I will still ask my missus but.
Wish me luck.
Good day.
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Polygamy and the other poly one that " allows " women to take multiple husbands should be allowed.
Hey what about homosexual polygamy? . This doesn't feel to me to be ummm " straight forward "
It should be.
Butt i think i am a little homophobic.
I can't think past it. So So weak.
BUT.
BUT.
Just when you think polygamy should be allowed. A picture of handsome man with 154 wives enters your head and i dont like that.
I dont think you should be allowed to have 274 wives.
Hold the phone...........
What about BI polygamy. Having 8 wives and three husbands ?
It needs alot of thinking to see if it is good or bad.
On a case by case it works.
I'd be jealous as of a bloke with half a dozen hot looking wives.
Altough i never have thought Hugh Heffiner was like a really " lucky " man.
I think the only thing that makes polygamy a victimless crime is the fact that i myself would like four maybe five wives.
And like the great BULLPROOF taught me.
IT ALLLLLLLLLL COMES DOWN TO SEX.
EVERYTHING DOES. ( TO benifit ).
Man are fuckin horrible hey ?
Did i just say that out loud.
Man are horrible is pretty general as humans are FARRRRR to complex.
But.
Man are horrible FULL STOP
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Don't forget the each wife had seven sacks.
and you need to also take into consideration thaf Each one of those sacks contained seven cats.
So thats 7+7+1
But cats aint people so we don't need to add them up.
Or do we?
PASS.....
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From a lawyer pov.
If P1 is a female then its only commen sense that she was being abused by P2 for years.
P2 would throw her around the house giving her black eyes.
P2 would viciously rape her everyday.
P2 even touched the kids.
Sooooo P1 should do 8 years with a min of 5 for soliciting. Or whatever hiring a hitnan charge is .
Which.
Which she also did not do.
Apparently P3 was in love with P1 and he did it for sexual reason. But thats another story.
P3 gets 25 years.
Andddddddddd.
You ask a " moral " question that involves dealings with law so that takes my morals out of it.
Morals shouldn't , dont allocate time.
severity.
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Being a JW is not nice anyways hey.
Why Telling a 8 year old girl about the end times must be on par with telling a 8 year old kid that they are not going to have birthday anymore EVERRRRRRRR.
thats fukin scary.
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Picture a 7, 8, 9, 10 , 11 , 12 year old boy or girl learning about this.
A few Years ago, i told my then 8 year old niece that allllllllll the people that don't go to church ( i didn't elaborate ) this part ,
I just said thag alllll the people that do not go to church everyweek will be killed.
( i went on to elaborate )
Jesus is going to return to earth and he will have red eyes, and when he looks at you , you will be turned to ash in a second.
( i went on and elaborated deeper )
I told her that her mummy and daddy will surely be killed.
And her pets.
ASH IN A INSTANT.
Anyway she seem to take it in stride at the time.
Then a week later my sister rang me and told me not ot talk about god to the little one again.
Apparently she didn't want to see mum mum and dad dad get burnt to death. Wuss
Sooooo i ask. .
How does one get their 8 year old daughter prepared for the return of Jesus.
NICELY. ?
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WHEN WILL JESUS ( NOT ) RETURN. Predictions.
I pre dick.
Jesus will not be doing the second coming thing this year.
Now it's a big call , as there is still like two and a bit months left.
Keep in mind that this can happen any day now.
HOLD.
WAIT FOR IT.
ALMOST NOW
HOLD.
GET READY.
Who thinks that the jesus coming 2nd thing will not happen in A WHOLE YEAR. ?
I'm not putting my name down for that.
Surely it has to happen within the next whole year.
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@TheDredPriateRoberts
Correct.
Buttttttttttttttttttttt
It's fun.
I also collect stamps.
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If you add One pile of sand to another one pile of sand = . What do you get.?
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I don't mindThe Mormons Christians.
They are my 7th favorite
And the way the book of Mormons come to be is a lot more believable then the other " mainstream " ones.
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@949havoc
Nice response man.
Nice post.
▪°•▪°•▪°•▪°•▪°•
The most popular is decided by the most popular response.
So we ask 74 priests what they think this one scripture means. ( in layman )
lets say 30 or 40 priests out of 74 think it means ( __________ this __________and that________ .
Then simply scratch out the scripture and replace it with what that largest number of higher level theists think the actual meaning is.
That first commandment, Commandment # 1 . It is beautiful.
Very well thought out.
Why It must have taken a few decades to come up with that one alone.
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Oh crap. .
Suggestive.
It does come down to nothing more then that.
Look I am going to need some time now.
Good day sir.
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@secularmerlin
You don't like being asked about if being hypnotized is real or not hey?
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Oh.
Drug free.
Hang on . Now That stuffs things up to.
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@secularmerlin
Do you believe Fred can be hypnotized?
And Without him knowing ?
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@secularmerlin
Do you believe that you can be hypnotized ?
Maybe even without you knowing it?
This ummmm ( FACT ) is it ?
It really messes up alot of ummmmm, hypothesis if you will.
Thinking just instantly hults there.
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We need to start arsking people high up in the jesus game simple straight forward question.
So when someone asks.
When will jesus return?
We can say. Well hear is what
314 priests.
44 cardinals.
Half a dozon or so arch bishops.
188 biblical scholars
say
We could narrow this bitch down to a
( jesus will return on a sunday Afternoon around 4 .33 pm est time to 4.40 pm est time.
June the 15th
2031.
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@949havoc
In this bible of mine. I have gone through and scrubbed out every word ( JESUS ) and replaced it with ( God )
TO SIMPLIFY.
Straight forward.
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Imagine
A 10 popes version.
Ten popes give there meaning of each scipture.
COMPILE. AND BAMMMMMMMMMMMMM.
The ultimate
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@949havoc
What about if we get a bunch of ummmm, top scholars if you will, and they give there interpretation of each scripture.
And maybe ( dumb it down a little.*)
Then compile all of the interps . Find the " most popular " interp
Then scrub out scripture and replace it with a eazy-2-read bible verse meaning.
You know what i mean Hav?
Instead of the prince John james or what ever it is version , have a " tell it like it is " version.
Now i know over time that people have done and do this and have been killed for such things but.
But.
I would buy a. Bible that scriptures have been replaced buy .
100 bishops true meaning of a scripture.
Or.
The . ( 1000 cardinals version ) scriptures replaced with eazy to follow what they think it means.
And COMPILE.
It has to be better then the current versions.
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@949havoc
Hi man.
Would you say that you are currently in the
( TOP 10,000 ) OF ALL TIME. At scripture translations ?
Would you say that you are currently in the
( TOP 10,000 ) OF ALL TIME. At scripture translations ?
Yes ?
No ?
Maybe ?
Thanks.
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Got me.
I CAN NOT get msg to dead people.
Very well played.
I CAN NOT get msg to dead people.
Very well played.
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The cheapest i can do it for is.
$48.30 for 3 msg to the dead.
Or $25.10 per msg.
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The Op reads.
Atheism is irrational,
I clicked on it only to find you TWO getting into a DEEP conversation workshop about.
WHAT HAPPENS WHEN WE DIE,
Well i thought that was sooooooooo funny.
You rational bastards.
Atheism is irrational,
I clicked on it only to find you TWO getting into a DEEP conversation workshop about.
WHAT HAPPENS WHEN WE DIE,
Well i thought that was sooooooooo funny.
You rational bastards.
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Atheism is irrational.
Fair enough.
So ummmmmm, What are you guys talking about ?
Oh
Your Talking about what happens when one dies .
I see.
After you guys finish figuring out what happens when we die.
We will get back to laughing at the stupid irrational atheists.
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I am not to sure how jesus will react when he sees all the crosses with him looking half dead on it.
Since the time is ni. Perhaps you can change them to like a healthy happier looking jesus sitting on a throne or something.
Don't say, ' i didnt warn you .
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We need A ( On the hour radar report from around your area. )
We need to know the very instance and the exact location as jesus touches down.
When he does get here.
Will He be traveling from town to town doing the turning people to ash on the back of a donkey ?
KEEP US ALL UP TO DATE.
The skys are all clear hear. No jesus in sight..
I repeat. NO JESUS DETECTED .
Over.
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The dog over the back of my house keeps barking like ive never heard befor.
Im going to go check.
It couldn't be could it ?
Its not jesus.
FALSE ALARM GUYS. The dog is barking at a tow truck.
Sorry.
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I don't reckon jesus is doing it today.
Well it doesn't feel like he is going to do it today.
This weekend perhaps?
It is going to be real real soon now but.
HOLD.
WAIT FOR IT.
ANY SECOND NOW.
STAND.
REAL SOON NOW.
BRACE YOURSELF.
WAIT FOR IT.
ITS COMING
Im going to have some lunch.
He better not do this return thing whilst im having my supper
I haven't time for him.
I am just not going to pay any attention to it.
i believe in jesus 100% anyways. So i really have nothing to worry about .
Plus i am already guaranteed a place in heaven as i have said that phrase you have to say to go to heaven , like a dozen times.
I except the lord jesus christ as my saviour.
Ecceptence Confirmed. ( see, im all good. )
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