Instigator / Pro
Conservallectual's avatar
1
Conservallectual
1417
rating
27
debates
24.07%
won
Topic
#4615

Barney is the devil(joke)

Status
Finished

The debate is finished. The distribution of the voting points and the winner are presented below.

Winner & statistics
Winner
1
2

After 2 votes and with 1 point ahead, the winner is...

Slainte
Tags
TV
Barney
Parameters
Publication date
Last updated date
Type
Standard
Number of rounds
2
Time for argument
Three days
Max argument characters
5,000
Voting period
One week
Point system
Winner selection
Voting system
Open
Contender / Con
Slainte's avatar
2
Slainte
1511
rating
25
debates
68.0%
won
Description

Pro : Has to give funny reasons why Barney is evil and why he is the devil
Con : Has to give funny reasons why Barney is not evil and why he's not the devil

The rule: The funniest wins

Round 1
Conservallectual's avatar
Conservallectual
Pro
#1
Forfeited
Slainte's avatar
Slainte
Con
#2
Barney is a horrific creature, and should have been euthanized at sight, on site.   However that does not render him the anti-christ, lucifer, or the devil.

Style Baby Style!!

 Let's be honest, Barney's fashion sense is a crime against all things stylish. From his perpetually purple attire to his inexplicable decision to wear a bowtie, Barney is a walking fashion disaster. It's as if he raided a clown's closet and decided to mix and match the most garish pieces he could find. The fashion police would definitely issue an arrest warrant for his crimes against fashion.  The devil would never stoop to that level.  Let's face it, the devil would never wear a bowtie.

Spectrum Perhaps?

Barney seems to have a vocabulary of about 10 words, and he's not afraid to use them repeatedly. Whether it's singing about love, friendship, or sharing, Barney's songs and catchphrases quickly become earworms that haunt your dreams. Imagine being stuck in a never-ending loop of Barney's "I Love You" song playing over and over again. That repetition and fixation, implies that Barney might be well on the spectrum. There is nothing wrong with that. The devil is far too clever, and would not have to resort to monotonous repetition.

Stoned Happy

While optimism is generally a good thing, Barney takes it to an extreme level. His perpetual state of cheerfulness is so unrealistic that it's hard to take him seriously. Imagine waking up every morning to Barney's toothy grin and over-the-top enthusiasm for the day ahead. It's enough to make even the most cheerful among us reach for the nearest grumpy cat meme.  It could be part of a pedophilia grooming plot.   Who knows.  The devil however could not fake that level of happiness.  

Those are three clear reasons why Barney is not the devil. 




Round 2
Conservallectual's avatar
Conservallectual
Pro
#3
Ah yes. Barney, that purple demon... I mean Dinosaur. However, he is actually the devil and here's the proof:


proof 1:
"Cute Purple Dinosaur"
First change all the "u"s to "V"s as the letter u did not originally exist in the latin alphabet
"Cvte Pvrple Dinosavr"
Now eliminate any letter that isn't a Roman numeral
YOU GET:   CV    V  L  DI    V
Convert to fibonacci: 100 5 5 50 500 1 5
Add them all up: 100 + 5 + 5 + 50 + 500 + 1 + 5 = 666
666 is the number of the beast (see Revelation 13:18)

proof 2:

The bible says Satan disguises himself as an angel of Light(see 2 Corinthians 11:14-15). Meaning he can disguise himself in to seemingly benevolent beings, like Barney. Children are innocent and easier to decieve into evil. But Barney's disguise isn't foolproof as he looks demonic.

Lets set the record straight: Barney looks uncanny. Why does he have human teeth and eyes? He looks like a demonic pedophile dressed in a suit trying to lure children into getting his "candy".

proof 3:

Demi Lovato acted in Barney when she was a child. Ever since then she has been mentally disturbed by the dark powers of the purple demon... I mean dinosaur. Just look at what happened to her:


only a powerful demon can do this horror.

proof 4:

Selena Gomez was also on Barney:


ooh those ratings must burn - Burn like fire and brimstone in hell at the end times

5th proof:
Barney destroyed an entire generation:
According to wikipedia: "The show is often cited as a contributing factor to the perceived sense of entitlement seen in millennials, who grew up watching the show.[32][33] One specific criticism is:
His shows do not assist children in learning to deal with negative feelings and emotions. As one commentator puts it, the real danger from Barney is "denial: the refusal to recognize the existence of unpleasant realities. For along with his steady diet of giggles and unconditional love, Barney offers our children a one-dimensional world where everyone must be happy and everything must be resolved right away.""
According to conservapedia(A conservative wiki): "In this "educational" children's television series, a big, purple, anthropomorphic Tyrannosaurus Rex named Barney teaches children about environmentalism, multiculturalism, and other unimportant issues. The title dinosaur also pampers children excessively instead of teaching them how to maturely confront negative emotions and feelings, which is often cited as contributing to a sense of entitlement affecting America's Millennial generation, which grew up watching the show as children and has an outspoken secular liberal population." Barney raised an entire generation of shameless, irresponsible snowflakes. Only a powerful demon like satan can destroy this many humans


6th proof: Just type Jihad.net on the web

Slainte's avatar
Slainte
Con
#4
Pro forfeited more than 40% of the debate and therefore has lost, per the voting policy found HERE

In the interest of comedy I shall retort.

1.  The math.  666 can be made up in many different ways, in many different environments.  So this walking mutated grape, with a smile you could see from space is being reduced to a demon because of a twisted interpretation of 666.   666 id the number OF the beast.  Not the number only used by the beast.  I don't discount that this spectrum dwelling, prehistoric pedophile may worship the devil.  Barney could have the number 666 tattooed on his tiny little crustaceous period urine fountain. That certainly does not make him the devil.

2.  I think Pro;s depth perception is similar to a one eyed Minion, or the last eight-ball they snorted was laced with something unknown to mankind.  Associating Barney with " an angel of Light" is like asking Stevie Wonder to iron your clothes.   It makes no sense.

3.  I agree that Demi has been negatively influenced by a demonic force.  As we know from the song "The Devil Went Down To Georgia". The Devil summons Demons.  They are different  I am not saying that Barney is a Demon, and if he is, he certainly hasn't earned a full patch to the club yet, cause he is a useless, irritating bag of purple, and therefore a useless demonic force.  No club would want him.  

4.  Pro is wrong about Selena Gomez.  She was haunted by a poltergeist. I understand the mixup, it happens all the time.   That poltergeist was Justin Bieber's alter ego. Poor thing will suffer a long time with that haunting.  However it was not a demon, or the devil.  

5.  I agree with Pro that Barney is no good and all harm.  He is like trying to serve week-old bacon wrapped shrimp at a mosque.  You can get more value out of a waterproof teabag than Barney.   That does not make him the Devil.  And in all fairness Pro, I would go to a confessional as soon as possible, and keep some holy water near you, because you calling Barney the Devil, is probably one of the largest insults he has heard, and that fucker is gonna be pissed off about it and come for you.

Be Safe.